THE Place

A morning's thoughts, I just copied them down, after a quiet morning alone..

I'm in THE place. Memories rushing through my head. The most loving hug I ever received was given to me right before I came here first. It's noisy today. Tourists are everywhere, but I feel alone. Then again, it's the whole point of coming here. I can't believe everything going on. It's too much. I need to get away, but someone held me back from going up there, someone's eyes and smile in my mind. I can't go up there unless he is with me. He didn't let me, although he wasn't there.

The cool breeze helps me relax, and think. I constantly ask the question, how is it that God forgives us all for every sin that we make, and we can't do the same thing? Am I weird? Is it too much to ask for someone to forgive? I know it may not be easy to give second, or even third chances, but everyone deserves them, everyone makes mistakes. We would be in a much happier place. Why do I feel like I give, and give, and things keep getting away? Me and him keep arguing, this was the worst week ever. I fight for the one who showed me this place. I don't want him to be alone, I care so much. I just wish he'd accept this, I just wish both of them would.

I grew up with mentalities. Since I was young, we were a very religious family. My parents always taught me, that if someone slaps you, you turn the other cheek. You do NOT go for revenge, you do NOT hit him back. I regret remembering that I blinded myself from this belief. What my parents taught me, is what everyone should live by. I forgive them, both of them for what they did. I understand them, and the pain they are in, and I want to be there for them. I just wish they know that.

I'm completely sure that they regret their mistakes, and I'm sure that they cry about it, because it hurts, I know it does. Why can't I be truthful without being shouted at or fought with? Isn't the truth the right thing? I said how I feel about this situation, and I just can't knock any sense into people. Great, I'm the weird one. Do this, do that, what about what I want to do? Else, its like "We're together for nothing", or so he said. It hurts to be treated like that. And it kills that I can't say what I think, let alone do it. The things I do and give mean nothing. It's like he's always the victim, and it's all my fault.

Here we go, all over again. 

Author's Note

I hope this doesn't bore you, I just thought I could share.