Meditation II

My eyes started bleeding when I saw how bright the sun can burn

I lay back over the hill, stretched until I hurt.

I arched up towards the sky, my chest swollen by unspeakable pain.

My heart is tired.

Love. It feeds me but it is gone.

Oh, god!

I can’t see anything. I can’t move.

It is all in my head, isn’t? But why do I still want to die?

I wish the earth swallows me whole

I wish I feel nothing.

I wish I am gone.

Reviews

[Dean]

when you put your finger on feelings, only then you have perhaps gone too far. Until then, may you find rich rewards in meditation. I did.


Oh. One of my pet peeves is common error. "lay" is past tense, unless it is command. Use it in line 2.

"laid" is transitive

[Eduardo Bautista]

thanks for correcting! i really have this thing with grammar ever since.

i'll change it. :)

[Dean]

you can count on me! :-)