the feeling inside

the feeling inside

A Poem by SJ

Your hand in mine

For all of time

Please guide me through

As I never want to be without you

You’re the breath in my body

You’re the beat in my heart

I’ve been waiting for this feeling

That I’m slowly revealing

I need to hold you

A need that’s become overdue

You’ve opened my eyes

To the feelings I have inside

 

© 2009 SJ


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Reviews

Hey there,

This piece is brilliant, it's concise without being too short, and there is a lot of meaning in each line.

A couple of additions, purely based on the flow of the piece:
(As I never want to be without you) becomes ( I never want to be without you)
(A need that's become overdue) becomes ( A need that's overdue)

Other than those two small thing I think this piece is excellent, well written and presented :)


Posted 14 Years Ago



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Added on November 19, 2009

Author

SJ
SJ

Cambridge, United Kingdom



About
I'm your average teenage girl (17), well i guess i am anyway :) I like to think if you have a a dream there's deffiantely a way to achieve it. I believe that there is someone out there for everyone, y.. more..

Writing
The Only One The Only One

A Poem by SJ