Chocolate Box

Crispy static fried babel fish

When the cloud of your mouth
drifts over here
Weather rapport is overcast
but the outcome already clear

The best thing I’ve seen today
is the back of you
Your gold hair curling in the wind
like a foil on a chocolate
You’ve been littering my street
You left your rubbish
where once you seemed sweet

Reviews

[J. Elsie]

yeah, well..

I tried to pic a favorite line. And I thought it was "The best thing I've seen today is the back of you..." but.. no.. because I loved the vision of gold hair curling in the wind and the next two lines oh and the first four lines... and.. well all of it, really.

Thanks to Ms. Emily Burns for recommending. Loving your stuff so far. You splatter emotion on my screen. You're the first person I've read this new year. Keep writing and you may be the last.

[Captain Goldpants]

It is ok, we are friends again ;-) Thanks for the comment. I like that particular line too, but my favourite, for posterity is still, 'the best thing I've seen today is the back of you'.

[A.T.B.]

What a goodbye peom. Mean! Meant to hurt!
best lines:
Weather rapport is overcast
but the outcome already clear

When you get over your hurt, write a couple of sweet lines. Don't let this poison your life ...