Relationship with the devil

depression... a devil in all of us. empathy... a mans worst Achilles heel

It’s not easy to walk away. But there comes a time when you have to realize what must be done. You can encourage change and help but until the person decides that theywant to change and are going to it won’t happen. Listening to constant negativity takes a toll on you. One day you’ll realize that you too are seeing the world the same way. You go from an upbeat happy friendly person to someone shut out from the world you see now as dark and negative. Your time is now spent pushing the positivity you do have towards that person as the dark thoughts invade them. You work to convince them they aren’t a failure, everyone doesn’t hate them, they’re not nothing. But after a while, after constant attempts at convincing with no avail you grow tired, you begin to feel there really is no hope. This isn’t even the scary part. It gets scary when you worry that one word, one miscommunication, one simple thing will put them over the edge. As first you think it’s nothing; they won’t do anything. That is until their location is unknown, until you see the blood on the knife, until you watch them hit themselves and there is nothing you can do, until they send you a picture of a gun to their head. Let that sink in. you can’t be honest because it leads to fights and fights lead to actions, the actions that hurt, actions that kill. So, you keep your mouth shut, you support them when they’re down, and you cry yourself to sleep from the hurt and worry. This goes on for a while, you go through life balancing on a tightrope. Your friends and family see it and they warn you that these actions aren’t normal, you’re no longer yourself, you need to get away from him and when you don’t they do. They try and hold on but eventually they can’t take it. They get frustrated by your lack of ability to see the pain he puts you through and they walk away hopeful that you will one day see it too. There comes a time where you are worn down to the point you must choose. You must choose to continue down this path of self-destruction with a person that despite much promise isn’t changing or to escape and risk the pain. You can prepare those in their life and hope they look out for them when you no longer can. You must decide to help yourself. You have to walk away and no matter how hard it is to not just give in to temptation and not have to witness their pain you must stay strong and turn your head away as bad as it sounds. Separate yourself. At first it will hurt but then you start to remember what it’s like to be happy. You feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders and as much as it still hurts sometimes you know you made the right decision.