Him After Me

Not really sure if I would call this a poem, but I think it's something. I wrote this in a state of anger and I think I put a lot of emotion into this.

This type of anger was hard to explain. 

And this was the gradual kind of revenge. 

I don’t want him back.

I just want him to know what he lost. 

I was sad for so long, 

sometimes I still get sad. 

I want him to taste it, 

like blood in his mouth.

I want him to lose sleep over how good we could’ve been if he hadn’t torn it all up. 

I hope he sees me laughing 

I hope it leaves knots in his stomach.

I want him to cry,

he never did cry. 

I want to be the thing that makes him finally break, 

to accept his own weakness in the face of the mess he created. 

I wish he would lose his composure, 

punch a wall, 

shout until his throat burns. 

One day he’s gonna take a walk in that park we first kissed in 

it’s gonna send something down his spine. 

He’s gonna sit on that bench and he will reminisce until he can’t take it anymore. 

He won’t go there again. 

He’s gonna play his same old music on his drives to school,

but all those songs still sound like me 

there is no escaping that.

 

Then he’s gonna do what I did; 

Try to heal himself with the lust of someone else. 

But that is like putting a band-aid on a bruise 

and he’ll just keep wishing it was my lips on his neck. 

And I am so sorry to the girl who loves him next. 

Because he’s gonna take her out and he’s gonna smile, 

but I’ll be on his mind the whole damn time. 

Something in him is gonna give eventually. 

And I hope it hits hard, 

hurts like hell, 

leaves him with regret on his shoulders. 

I’ll be something worth missing.

Author's Note

Let me know what you think and give me advice on how to structure this.