Blood

Blood.
You feel the blood.
Dripping.
Slowly down your face and hands.
You grin. A psychotic grin. You feel your brain click as something snaps inside you.
The room you are in, is covered in the blood of your victims. All but a mirror on the wall.
You turn to the full body mirror and see your form crouched over their body. You can see the glint in your eye with the madness you had acquired several seconds before.
You pull your hands from their squelchy intestines and walk to the mirror. Placing your drenched hands on the glass, gently. You pull back and violently slam your fists into the surface. You see cracks branch out from your hands, covering the mirror in shiny lines.
You look up at your face and smirk at the blood crusted hair and skin. The person in the mirror is you.
Broken and cracked.
The smell of the iron in the blood intoxicates you. You lick your lips hungrily. Some of the liquid transfers to your taste buds and you relish the unique taste.
They didn't understand you.
Now? They're dead.

Author's Note

What do you think? If you reviewed it would be amazing c: thanks so much

Reviews

[Darkimmortal]

Okay, usually I comment on grammar but the first thing I have to say is I LOVE THIS. Okay, the only thing i noticed gramatically is that I would be crouched over "bodies". Also, this is just me being picky, but the word "acquired" really does not fit there. Might I suggest that you used "succumbed to" or something along those lines, because that word choice doesn't quite fit.

Alright, I usually do not like stories like this as they are choppy and bounce around, but it works perfectly for what you have done here. You force my mind to flit from subject to subject, making the feeling of insanity so much more effective. I also love what you did with the mirror, and that last line..... so ridiculously effective. It is a very strong and haunting end to such an awesome story.
The only criticism I have is that there isn't more...
Bravo my friend.
Keep penning!

[blackcayne]

thankyou so much! i appreciate it

[SleeplessVolcano]

Disturbingly beautiful......this could be scene one of a movie....:)

[blackcayne]

Yeaaaah thats exactly what I was aiming for :)

[Rob Santana]

Hey this is really cool. I think you can continue with this story. A lot more you can incorporate. Hope you plan on adding on to this story.

[blackcayne]

thank you c:

[AruKai]

Senpai is so proud ;w; and you asked me to teach you to write? =w= psh- i can't do crap //saaaadfaaace

[blackcayne]

senpai

[Sanjh]

Nice work, describing an idea with so much detail is what makes it unique. I wish there was more... :)

[blackcayne]

thank you c: I try to immerse the reader in what's happening :D

[Sanjh]

you are welcome...:)

[JC]

damn, this is dark and really well done, i felt crazed for a moment there, you got in my head, i could smell the blood.

[blackcayne]

mwahahahhaa.. ahem I mean, thanks c: