Trigger

Pull it back, pull it back now

with frozen hands

and freezing hearts now

ice so cold it brands

warm the barrel, melt your mind

that thing you've lost you'll never find

when it all starts to feel this way

when your tired frame starts to sway

fall back, back onto me

I'll set you free

wrench away the gun

declare that you're undone

put the safety on

and stay until the pain is gone

when your eyes are flat, dead, and dry

I'll drench you in tears 'til you learn to cry

beauty is eternal if you give it all away

let it shine for tomorrow, a brighter day

fall back, back onto me

I'll set you free

wrench away the gun

declare that you're undone

put the safety on

and stay until the pain is gone

so cold, so cold is the lead

how lost, how lost are the dead

they're searching for a spark

to light the endless dark

hope, their last match-snuffed out

smothered by their doubt

when I think of all she could've done

of all the wars she could've won

the casualties seem way too high

too many revolutionaries chose to die

fall back, back onto me

I'll set you free

wrench away the gun

declare that you're undone

put the safety on

and stay until the pain is gone

rise above

rise against

give your love

without pretense 

fall back, back onto me

I'll set you free

wrench away the gun

declare that you're undone

put the safety on

and stay until the pain is gone

Author's Note

I do have a tune for this, but I am more of a writer and less of a musician. I would love to hear from you- what kind of music do you imagine with this song? Does the meter and rhyme and rhythm allow for a smooth transition from paper to voice? WHat can I do to make this song flow more? Thank you for comments!

Reviews

[emipoemi]

ok! The chorus is amazing! and the song keeps delivering. I felt it, my friend, and I believe I would feel it even more if I heard it. But I love the lyrics, and the story is profound and poignant! Simply well done!

[Rachel Richardson]

Thank you! I was hoping you would take a look at this one because I know what a fan you are of poetry that is lyrical. Thank you so much for all the feedback.

[Revery]

This is amazing. It flowed as it is. Music, I don't know, I was too lost in the picture it painted and story it told. Very impressive.

[Rachel Richardson]

Thank you!

[miahstr]

I can really imagine this going to a punk rock song maybe something good charrollet or All American Rejects might sing. I do really enjoy it. Reminds me of adams song a bit.

[Rachel Richardson]

Thank you! That's exactly what I was going for!

[Los3]

Never seen any kind of work this way great I would enjoy working with you on music

[Olivia Clune]

This one is so moving. I am intrigued by your work!!

[Rachel Richardson]

Thank you! I really appreciate that you took the time to read my poems and comment on them.

[Chris A Jones]

I like it. But I am also not a musician, so I really can't answer your question. I think there is at least enough rhythm that maybe with a little tweaking you could turn it into a song if it weren't already there.

[Rachel Richardson]

Thank you for your review!