Letter to Santa Claus ( weird writers prompt)

Santa sat in his chair, content for the time being, with a chocolate chip cookie in left hand and milk on his bedside table; and opened one of the letters from the mail bag next to his chair.
 It read:

Dear Mr. Claus,

I'm writing to inform you that your existence is in fact impossible. Yes, you aren't just seeing things and this is not a letter from a psycho...however, if you don't exist who am I writing to?...ANYWAY what I wanted to say is that you don't exist, you don't have reindeers and little freaky dwarfs or whatever it is that makes presents in that imaginary factory of yours. Deal with it! You were just invented so that the industry could take money from these puny little humans, and make them sing stupid songs whilst dancing round some tree, they cut out of the forest, like idiots. By the way this letter will not be harmful nor toxic to you or your family if you admit the reasons stated above.

Sincerely

Dracula
P.S Send me my present's to this address, same as always:
St. Magnus, Hospital for Mentally Unstable ,room number 666.
P.P.S
Here is a poem for you Mr. Claus, hope you like it:

Christmas is for fools,
Invented by dupes,
Who lonely were
And never had a scare
They wanted a big tree,
Where stars and angels
Have a glee,
Too bad I was there 
Lit a fire,
Which burned
Higher and Higher,
Oh merry Christmas to me.

That night, and the night after that, and the night after that...Santa couldn't sleep, just lay in his bed in between green and red covers, staring at the ceiling. From then on, he made his elfs read the letters, before he read them himself.

------ xD

Author's Note

Don't know if I got the prompt right but it was soo much fun writing it, so thanks :D

Reviews

[Ares]

Fantastic! I loved it! Made my day, XD

[Arsenic Nemesis]

XDD this made me chuckle, I like it a lot! Only thing is I think that "Instable" should be "Unstable" other than that, I can't see any mistakes. Love the little poem at the end. Maybe Santa and Dracula should have a competition to see how many people believe in them? XDD good bit of word here, immortal, made laugh. Farewell, immortal~

[Short.Nerd]

Haha i love this! I love how his name is Dracula and he lives in the hospital for the mentally unstable. (: You did a great job!

[Cafe Reader]

Great job! Entertaining!

[Gone]

Lol this brought a smile to my face. I wrote something similar to this for class, but it was an essay. Dracula was a nice touch, I burst into laughter when I read that as well as the hospital bit.

[nono]

Haha, it's awesome! I was hoping someone did this one! Well it's my fault if you did it wrong, I didn't clarify I sent out the prompts before I went to school and was not quite wide awake. Well I think it's awesome! I love the last part, he made the elves read them. Clever idea. I gotta kick out of it. :D Nice job. Keep up the awesome work!