The Agony of Silence

A transatlantic collaboration by Phil Sanders and Brenda Sue. (Navy is Phil and Wine is Brenda)

She doesn't understand ...
My life has changed
My needs are varied like the winds of time ...
Taking my heart to new beginnings ...
Different desires ...
The past lies buried in the ground ...

He doesn't understand...
Life has changed me
Together, alone, in this prison we call home...
Fantasies have become my only escape...
Always exhausted...
My heart dreams of days gone by...

She doesn't understand...
Frustration abounds...
I am locked into suburban boredom
My mind is dulled and my passion doused
A sensual frozen waste...
My soul is frozen and bound...

He doesn't understand...
The magic is gone...
A special touch, a loving look, our favorite song...
Could make so much difference...
Passion renew...
The future looks dim unless I get through to him...

She doesn't understand...
Her kisses infrequent and cold
The touch like winter and snow
I need the fire igniting again ... my body aroused
Tired and lonely
My heart screams for love...

He doesn't understand....
Loneliness lurks...
I need him to hold me, not scold me
Imprisoned by duty's chains...
Vague memories of young love...
Vanished like a dream lost in the night...

We don't understand...
What happened to us
We're living the life of our parents...
Doing what we said we would never do
Him in one corner, her in another...
Where has the magic gone?

SILENCE..........................................

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Navy is Phil and Wine is Brenda, Gray is what both are thinking.

Reviews

[E. M. Murren]

Your individual passions burn so brightly in this work that melded thus the reader is mesmerized while identifying with the sentiments. You have defined the problem in so many relationships so well. The goals to acheive as well as the mountain which each needs to terain. Fabulous work.

[George Love]

The ebb and flow of the relationship is seen easily once the reader places themselves into one of the characters. Well done.

[BrightEyes]

I think you've captured exactly what does occur in so many relationships - not so much that the love is gone - but the failure to fan the flames. Both lost in their own grief, not reaching out to one another - such a sad piece, two people wanting to keep their love alive but failing to communicate with the other. great job you two!

laura

[Lady Of Darkness]

Great work you 2, i love how the poem goes so well together then apart in different directions, you both did the theme very well i think.

[OceanTropic]

Imprisoned by duty's chains.

Amazing line. So metaphorical and it makes so much sense. I really liked how you showed two different points of views as if they have no idea of each others existence. Which, of course in all cases, they dont.
It makes alo of sense, and it can relate to many people, it is a common thing for the "magic" to fade and disappear.

[Erotic Goddess]

Fantasies have become my only escape...
A sensual frozen waste...
A special touch, a loving look, our favorite song...
My heart screams for love...
Imprisoned by duty's chains...
Him in one corner, her in another...

All my favorite lines, and there were so many!

WOW!! You have both done such a stunning job on this piece. It is simply heartwrenching how true this is and how close to home this can hit for so many couples I know. This is a tragedy that so many fiery relationships can turn so stone cold so fast that neither sees it coming. This is well done.

Love,
Stephanie

[The Archangel Gabriel]

You have done a wonderful job of capturing the relationship gone stale. I like to suggest that relationships tend to go bad after about 3 months if you do not put continuous effort into maintaining quality time together. The magic of the hunt and getting to know somebody new is really amazing, but longterm relationships seem to take a lot of work and effort to succeed!

Wonderfully penned!

-Gabe

[Sally Edwards]

I read this and cried, so sad, angry, dejected,lonely so poignant my tears flowed maybe because I have been there myself.......

[Blindmikey]

This is utter gold. Not only has it been penned so damn well, encapsulating the seperate unique-and-yet-the-same thoughts of two, I'd say, whom are still in love, but it's such a light for so many a dark. This is far from a unique problem, damaged, trampled, and broken by the fear of voice. Little can't be solved if we understand. But we'll never understand if we don't take the risk to be heard.

So damn beautiful. I can't get over it.

[April Child]

We don't understand...
What happened to us
We're living the life of our parents...
Doing what we said we would never do
Him in one corner, her in another...
Where has the magic gone?

Oh sad but oh so good. Trapped by their non-communication :( Well done you 2. One suggestion... maybe use different colours to identify each persons writing, I mean its fairly obvious who said what from the 'he's' and 'she's' but just a thought.

[Natasha Ashway]

Two minds connect in what I will call 'therapeutic' dialogue.

'She doesn't understand ...
My life has changed..'

'He doesn't understand...
Life has changed me..'

I love the way the couple's point of views are illustrated. How their hearts draw lines back to the same place i.e. this is what is wrong, this is why I hurt. Different angles, the same loss - of a soul mate's companionship. It's lovely, perceptive - your words build bridges through the mist of misunderstanding portrayed.

I like the way everything - separation, emotion, confusion - falls into the void of Silence; the culpable sin, generator of doubt - in the end.
I like the hope for renewal I felt as I read this piece through.

This is truly a success. You guys are great. I want MORE! I will wait.