Extermination

Another poem about what I went through with the Voices I heard in April 2024 Part of my Psych Ward Poetry

I never valued Silence

I have always had My ‘Friends’

Always Present, in My head

Voices that Cared

Now new ones have moved in

Voices I do now Know

Ones I Do Not Like

They do not like Me, either

“Hurt Yourself,” They say

“The world is Better without you”

“No one will miss you”

“They will be Happier with You gone”

The relentless Attacks

I am mentally exhausted

The Voices hold my Friends down

Barely allowing Them to Speak

I want Them gone

I Desire Them to leave

I need an extermination

Even if it is Silent

Reviews

[John Sullivan]

Yeeeeaaaaah, I'm a person with schizo-affective disorder/schizophrenia, so I hear ya. I've got good and bad voices, left and right maybe... it's inexplicable stuff. Good luck, friend!

[Bipolarbear.979]

Thank you, as always.
They got the Bad Ones gone, but sadly, my Good Ones are very quiet now. They're all still there, but it is almost like an echo of what they used to be, and they are not as constant. Idk, perhaps that is for the best, but it is odd to have silence now going on from time to time.

[John Sullivan]

I need to go see my doctor about a change of meds I'm afraid. Too many voices, both good and bad... I hear you about the strangeness of silence though... it's like waking up without arms one day, somethings just... missing.

[Bipolarbear.979]

Exactly!!
They put me on Seroquel, but it didn't really help the Voices, and messed with my vision. So they got me off that and on Geodon. It is what helped me out.

[John Sullivan]

Nice. I'm on Abilify right now. It does wonders for my mental faculties (I was a zombie on Haldol and Risperidone) but it just isn't working as an anti-psychotic anymore ):

[Bipolarbear.979]

Gotcha. Abilify didn't help me, I was on that for a long time, all sorts of doses. Funny how one thing helps some and not others! Meds are crazy like that.

[John Sullivan]

Exactly right. Everyone's brain is different, so much trial and error... I think my doctor mentioned Invega, I'm more than willing to try it, but I am admittedly scared of becoming a relative mental vegetable again. Oh well. How long have you been diagnosed?

[Bipolarbear.979]

They began trying to diagnose me when I was 19 (1998). They started with depression. Current diagnoses are bipolar, PTSD, ADHD, and OCD. I have more letters in my medical chart than the alphabet it feels like.

[John Sullivan]

Yeeup, I feel that. I should have guessed by your (amazingly hilarious in a good way) username. Punny fella

[Bipolarbear.979]

Well thank you ;)