IT�S TIME

 

Currish moon

Rising low

Conflict

Ominous

Disaster

Looming nigh

Golan Heights

Dismal Darfur

Global chaos

Festering

Hatred

Rampant

Torrid atrocities

We wallow in self pity

Blind

To guttural truth

It’s time

For love

Urgent prayer

Peaceful etiquette

No more excuses

Behind us

All the lies

Fine divide

Between the darkness

Brilliant holy light

Becoming crystal clear

 

 

© Bill Grimes Jr. 2007

Reviews

[[untitled]]

Ah a fellow writer of simplistic poetry. Great piece. And I say that about very few poems on this site, nice to see there are still some talented writers around. A few suggestions, take them as you will.

"We wallow in self pity"--- for this line, i was trying to figure out a way to remove the "in" as in poems such as this, words like that are usually cut. So maybe try "We wallow, self pity" or something along the lines of that. I love the challenge of finding ways to cut those words, and make the poem better at the same time.

"All the lies"--- maybe try "Only lies" keeps it simple, cuts out the filler words

"Between the darkness"---- you don't really need the "the" there. The impact and idea would be the same with out it, and it would flow better.

I don't know how simplistic in style you intended this poem to be. So there are some suggestions (like I said take them as you please, they are merely personal opinion) that might be of use.

Great read, I look forward to browsing through more of your work.

Cheers,
Clara

[Rambling Prose]

I love your style of writing. So very much can be said with so little voice and you accomplished this in leaps & bounds.

A poignant piece of writing...

[Bill Grimes Jr.]

Thank you for your kind words my friend. Unfortunately, our world is inherently evil with hatred, greed, lust, vanity.......all of these nasty ingredients thrown into a boiling vat of foolish pride......My role is to love as I am so loved by our Maker.....One day at a time. Love and kindness is indeed infectious......Let us keep spreading it through our words and deeds.

Peace,

Bill :-)

[Wildfleour]

It is time for LOVE - how come with so many people understanding it, it still seems that the world is lacking it?