But you still have whole of me...

Acrostic

 

 

 

 

 

But… you still have whole of me…

 

 

Between battlegrounds is where I stand,

Unarmed and without any reason to live,

Thirsty for some rain to hit this burning land…

 

 

You gave me a new light every time,

Of which I'm so much missing is your shine,

Unconsciously here I wait for the end of my life…

 

 

Still maintaining a hope for this life is an art,

This endless pain silently kills me every night.

I wonder how you could survive inside of my heart,

Laceration of my feelings I hopelessly need to abide.

Like a piece of paper you are tearing me apart...

 

 

Hollow is my soul and eyes are so wet,

A heart so much empty for which I regret.

Veins still alive with blood which is so cold,

Every tear inside myself I need to hold...

 

 

Wounds of this life won't heal so soon,

Heartless feel with which I belong.

Overcast somewhere I still see my moon,

Lodestar can't even guide my way home.

Evanescently I surrender life of my own…

 

 

Oscillates your presence still on my mind,

Forever I know you'll stay here by my side.

 

 

Misdeed I committed but I'm so amaze to see,

Endlessly here I'm alive but…you still have whole of me…….

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Amanda]

i know how you feel, my friend....though i was the one that left my relationship, i still feel the same way. sometimes, no matter what happens in life and in any relationship, things happen and sometimes not always for the best. for me, it was for the best, even though i feel at times that if things had been different, i would have stayed. i have no regrets only that it didn't work out the way i wanted it to.

i hope that the pain will subside in time, but it is always the best medicine, time is.

nice, but very sad write.....

Always,

Amanda

[jumbie's #1 fan]

This poem is awesome. the emotions protruding out of it are so vivid and emotional. it's very beautiful. great job

[Dalaina Renee]

Very cool!

[Ru Banerjee]

Awesome, with brilliant depth of imagery related to loneliness, isolation and the agony of loving! What strikes me while reading it is how you carry your pain, pathos and hunger to love in the recesses of your mind with brilliant doses of symbolism! Like in the lines: "Hollow is my heart and my eyes are so wet,/ A heart so much empty for which I regret", or like here: "Overcast somewhere I still see my moon,/Lodestar can't even guide my way home./Evanescently I surrender life of my own"�speaks of your silent suffering with such an aura and essence of your own that mystifies and demystifies romantic pain again and again...outstanding work celebrating romantic agony, desolation and the crude reality of life!

[Nely Amorim]

This is a sad and reflective piece and I truly hope someday you can give your whole heart to someone because it would be most unfair to only give her a part of it. I do understand the pain and I thank you for sharing this piece with me and entering it in my contest.

[Together]

T-H-I-S I-S A-W-E-S-O-M-E- !!!

[Michael X]

Bhavya, I sincerely enjoyed reading the depth, as established in the first three lines, where desire surfaces as sentiment and the willingness to succeed, reading, one can feel the encouraging sense of hope,

in knowing the future is uncertain and anything is possible if the heart believes it so, reflecting how life imitates art, expression as well as those things defining the heart, as well as outlook, to know what it means to be hhallow, like a shadow, desiring light to pass beyond the source of its maker, such is life, to be nothing until the

light of the creator, and in many ways your words draw the heart to contemplation, as the passion is pondering in essence, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this acrostic work of art, thanks for sharing it with us.
Take Care, Mike


"Between battlegrounds is where I stand,
Unarmed and without any reason to live,
Thirsty for some rain to hit this burning land…

[Loribeth215]

Yes, maybe now but not forever.
Those bonds do wear thin. One day, you won't even notice, and you'll think to yourself, oh. That's finally over!

[Kena Dawn Augustine]

Hooray!! excellent! excellent! I love everything about this poem: the acronym, how you expounded on: She still have whole ofme....the choice of words you used, the picture you painted in our minds, the type of font you used, colors, pictures. etc etc etc

Put this in my favorites. And I am picky what I choose too. Good job! keep writing!

kena

[Jaffa Forbes]

Very nice, powerful imagery with the pictures as well. I like the first line best.

Jaff :)

[Suzanne Deakins]

This indeed sounds like ballad. Heart felt work, the only part I dont like is the rhyming for some reason it seems to distract from the overall work. I will watch for more of your work.