I waited in the RAIN!!(part-II)

If you really wanna get this one, then you first gotta read " I waited in the Rain" http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/bhavya_kaushik/186309/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I Waited in the RAIN!!! (Part-II)

 

 

 

 

Sound of thunder started ricocheting,

And it was raining all over again.

But this time the feel was mutating,

As…I began to overcome this pain.

 
Children were playing together in the rain,

And Birds were flying off the horizon.

But I won't make the same mistake again,

Suddenly I saw a girl playing a sweet nocturne.

 

I considered it as just a hallucination,

But she was real and I got thunderstruck.

Yes, it was the same day and same old station,

And I immediately ran to believe my luck

 

I looked into her eyes which were full of tears,

Neither she said a word nor do I ask a question.

Just her presence gave me the strength to fight my fears,

And we just looked at each other without any motion.

 

Gnarled and multitude leaves were falling with the rain,

But her soul was full of guilt and conviction.

As somehow we both experienced the same pain,

The same deadly and cursed emotion.

 

 

And finally its time for me to rewrite my poem-"I waited in the rain" with lines-

 

 

"I looked outside my window pane,

A girl was standing alone in the rain.

I remember the day when she didn't came,

And everyone thought that I went out of my brains.

But finally today I will erase this pain,

As….She finally came...

Yes…She finally came…"

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

The inspiration behind this one is basically my own write "I waited in the rain" lolz.. :D
So...If you haven't read that one..SO..here is the link for "I waited in the rain"
http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/bhavya_kaushik/186309/

:)

Reviews

[Innocent]

You know for reading this write I actually first read the first part of this piece.
And after reading both of your writes I came up with a conclusion that you've actually written a short story through your poems which is such an amazing thing.
Here also, I found great imagery and got a feeling that as if I'm also there in the rain with you guys.
I'm also happy that finally love came to you, may be after facing so much suffering. But, it finally came and you ended it in such a beautiful way.
And I really found that if anyone really wanna get this piece the she/he first must read its first part.
Beautiful and a very brilliant write.

[Ruby Moon]

i like the ending...sweet
but i am not a forgiving person (i think)

"I looked outside my window pane,
A girl was standing alone in the rain."
that got to be my fav lines

[Kevin Andros]

Nice chota write. The words played around and fused in it creates a good and desired effect. Nice continuation. Baithke jhak marne se to achcha hai. HE he! Anyways, The pictures also created a good effect, which seems to be a speciality of yours. But I wanted to ask you one little thing:

"Barsat se sardi aur sardi se garmi aa gaya fir bhi tumhare dil me barish hi ho rahi hai kya!?"

Think and answer that! Ah ha ha ha!

Anyway, nice write. "Aur thora baal waal sukhake thora garmi me aao aur mazaa lo"!

~KA~