Broken Dreams...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BROKEN DREAMS…

 

 

I faced defeat at every step of my life,

Trying to kill myself every night…

My questions were never heard,

And living only became absurd.

I'm here alone with my broken dreams,

Broken inside…

 

 

My broken dreams now fallen and scattered,

And waiting for someone to pick them and gather.

I never dreamt of something very large,

But this life for me always remained a mirage.

I'm here alone with my broken dreams,

Broken inside…

 

Once on dreaming love I got betrayed,

And it cut my heart like a razor's blade.

That dream's broken and lying on a corner,

I need to live my life in same broken manner.

I'm here alone with my broken dreams,

Broken inside…

 

I never got success and was cheated every time,

When I tried to fulfill the innocent dreams of mine.

No one ever noticed my sacrifice and pain,

They even dumped me for their own gains.

I'm here alone with my broken dreams,

Broken inside…

 

I'm here alone with my broken dreams,

Broken inside…

And...It's not easy to be me….

 

 

Reviews

[.mate.feed.kill.repeat.]

The images you used at the beginning and end of this piece complimented your words very well.

You had a beautifully reliable rhythm and your word choice was perfect for what you were describing. Too often people overdo their words and their poetry loses meaning, but this was definitely not the case. Your lines flowed very nicely. I like how you concluded each stanza with the same lines.

I also like how you concluded this piece with an ellipses. This kind of makes the reader think there's gotta be more to this story, but it also concludes quite well.

This is piece is beautiful. You are a talented writer; keep it up!

[Karl]

This is so dark and depressing.

[Adela Muresan]

Nice imagers you included.
Yeah, good confession poem.
Your straight forward description of the back whole you fell in is very captivating...but I think you should have tried to make it a little bit more elegant...with more speech flowers.

A.M.

[.:Naiira Harlow:.]

The imagery in this poem is absolutly spectacular! It is a very compelling and emotional piece. Good work!

[Together]

This is very dark and painful, but I loved it though!

[The Mad Prophet]

Very nicely done, and thank you for submitting this in my contest. It is worthy to be apart of the Broken Mirror Piece, and I am glad you shared it with us.

Sentiments from your local Mad Prophet

[Fran Marie]

A powerful and intense poem so very well

expressed and wonderfully penned~Fran Marie

[Dalaina Renee]

Wow, very cool.

[Donald Cole]

nice and real. blunt. and it carries the point of one side. i like poems hat end in hope, yet this effectively gets its message across.

[Angelic Darkness]

This is a powerful poem, firm, and to the point. Words like this
are a form of release, healing. Good job and keep up the good work..AD