I waited in the RAIN!!

This piece describes the endless wait of a person for true love...but unfortunately its something which never ever came..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I WAITED IN THE RAIN…

 

I looked outside from my window pane….

A black cloud was heavily pouring rain….

But there was a promise to maintain…

So I went outside and stood behind that train…

That black cloud was still pouring rain…

Many people gone and many came again…

Some laughed and some thought I’m out of my brain…

That black cloud was still pouring rain…

But there was a promise to maintain….

So I stood behind that old train…

I waited…I waited…But…

You never came…

But… you never came…

 

A tear poured out of my eyes…

Thinking about our past lives…

Something penetrated deep inside my soul…

My heart...oh!! My heart beat no more...

My search was futile for you to find…

It’s something which I can’t hide…

I remember that promise to be together till the moment we die…

See...everything is just same here…except you and I…

People say that time has its own way….

So I waited and waited through nights and days…

But...you never came…

 

That very black cloud was still pouring rain…

But there was a promise to maintain….

So I stood behind that old train…

People thought I’m out of my brain…

Many gone and many came again…

That black cloud was still pouring rain…

I waited and waited…

But…you never came …

You never came …

 

My heart just thought of cursing you…

But it’s something which I can’t do…

I felt something on my hand…It was a little bird…

And first time in my life…I felt out of my words….

I looked upon that deep blue sky…

And the sound of rain acted as a lullaby…

I then saw a building of huge height…

As if it was hiding all my life’s light…

 

 

That very black cloud was still pouring rain…

But there was a promise to maintain….

So I stood behind that old train…

People thought I’m out of my brain…

Many gone and many came again…

That black cloud was still pouring rain…

I waited and waited…

But…you never came …

You never came …

 

 

Tears started flowing down my face….

Since it was dark, so no one glanced…

My body soaked away…

But these tears are finding their new way….

And I thought of giving myself a smile…

But it’s something which I can’t do in this life…

 

That very black cloud was still pouring rain…

But there was a promise to maintain….

So I stood behind that old train…

People thought I’m out of my brain…

Many gone and many came again…

That black cloud was still pouring rain…

I waited and waited…

But…you never came …

You never came …

 

And…my heart broke that night…

But…but…you never came…

You never came…

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

ok! First of all to be clear this piece is actually a Song lyric...

And the fact that I literally stood there in the rain that day...yeah...This isn't a metaphor...
As� Sometimes we used to do many foolish things just to maintain some promises...
The same thing happened with me that day...When I waited for someone very long and stood there in the rain�But unfortunately my heart broke that night but she never came�
This one's damn close to my heart because it�s a "REAL" one :)

Reviews

[!!..Love..!!]

Oh!! My gosh!! This is such a terrific piece. So sad ..I can see a tear in each and every line of your piece. At least, it brought tears to my eyes. Its is beautifully and uniquely sad and Thats the real strength of your piece. And also lovely repetition of few lines. It just makes the entire piece linger a lot and If its a lyric then I need to admit that it's the most powerful and heart break song I've ever read.
I mean what a emotion and such a beautiful write which can melt any one's eyes.
I don't know ..is it like you stood in the rain at that day or its simply a metaphor...But you've conveyed your feelings very well..


"And...my heart broke that night...
But....but...you never came...
You never came..."

I also felt that every "...." (dots) made it felt like you were so hurt and broken from this endless wait that you couldn't say the sentence out properly
like after crying... broken and hurt..I mean for me this is such a emotional and beautiful poem.

The best I've read in Writer's cafe till date.
and..Its true..

I would kill to have this much of skill of creating such a beautiful piece which can bring tears in anyone's eyes( at least It brought tears to mine)

"This piece describes the endless wait of a person for true love...but unfortunately its something which never ever came."
Very very well description you gave here of your piece.
Lovely indeed..
Awesome and a superb read..
Thanks a lot..thanks a ton for posting it here and for sharing it with all of us..
You just keep writing man!

[Rosalie Barrows]

This made me cry. This is very well written and wow I can feel the pain in this. It's very sad but. OMG. I loved it. Keep up the good work.

[Rosary]

There is a few spelling errors but this is a beautiful song and i would love to hear it played

[Fran Marie]

Awesome piece of riting so beautifully penned and expressed in poetic verse~Well donE! indeed!~Fran Marie

[D. L. Hutson]

Well, you've wowed me again. this was awesome.

[Carole]

I would love to hear this in song. Do you play and sing it with the guitar? It is beautiful and flows perfectly with a rhythm unmatched to many.

That very black cloud was still pouring rain�

But there was a promise to maintain�.

So I stood behind that old train�

People thought I'm out of my brain�

Many gone and many came again�

That black cloud was still pouring rain�

I waited and waited�

But�you never came �

You never came �

It evokes a sadness in its reader that is "REAL," Bhavya! Mission accomplished. The pictures were near perfect for this piece and a perfect write all the way around. Kudos!

[Roxy]

This is so heart wretching.
And I agree with love that it felt like you were so hurt and broken from this endless wait that you couldn't say the sentence out properly
like after crying... broken and hurt..I mean for me this is such a emotional and beautiful poem.
I agree..brilliant write!

[Golden]

And�my heart broke that night�

But�but�you never came�

You never came�"

This write brought tears to my eyes..
Very heartbreaking and sad.

[Blue Rose]

Anything like this is really very unfortunate to happen.
I'm really very sorry for you.
It's right that our best piece comes when we write something about ourselves, as if like you did here.

[Blackbeats]

The sense of hopelessness and wait has been very well described and it painted a sense of imagery in reader's mind.
A great write!

[Innocent]

I loved this one man!
The pain and grief has been beautifully described in it. The best thing is that it's actually a song and I'm sure it will sound good.
What attracted me towards this poem is basically your work "I waited in the Rain II " which is like a squeal to this one and that's why I first decided to read this piece which I found brilliant or I should say one of the best out here.
This piece brought tears to my eyes and like what else can I say. Brilliant work!