Freedom

A Story by Here Beyond

Cefirina Zeller goes to elope.

“I want to marry you,” Cefirina said tentatively, looking at her hands.

Nikolaus looked at her, blinking in surprise. He recovered after a moment, then considered the woman across from him for a minute. “Cefirina,” he began patiently as if he were speaking to a child. “It isn’t possible for us to get married. Remember that you said that your father wouldn’t approve.”

“He doesn’t have to know,” Cefirina pointed out, her voice tight. The mere mention of her father agitated her, although, her father wasn’t the biggest issue in this situation. The fact was that Cefirina was already married. Nikolaus knew this, to an extent. He just supposed that her husband had died and Cefirina went along with it. However, Herr Zeller was not dead. He was very much alive and had quite the temper.

Nikolaus’s thought process was clear on his face and Cefirina could see him arriving at his conclusion. “You’re suggesting that we…elope?”

Her chest constricted involuntarily. That wasn’t exactly what she meant to imply, and honestly, she wasn’t too sure that it was a good idea, but she had a moment of indecision that left her unable to respond. On the one hand, an opportunity to start over was very tempting. After all, she had made poor decisions and wasn’t a fan of anyone that she was related to. Nikolaus was nice enough. He liked her, loved her even, and Cefirina got the impression that he was an honest man.

On the other hand, she had a bad feeling about leaving everything she knew behind. All of those years of hard work down the drain along with her self-respect. It wasn’t something that was as easily gained as it was lost.

And yet, despite her anxiety, Cefirina gave Nikolaus a small nod and forced a tiny smile. “Yes, we’ll run.”

Nikolaus smiled, got up, and embraced Cefirina tightly. “I love you,” he stated, nearly dragging her off balance when he shifted his weight.

Cefirina’s confidence was boosted by Nikolaus’s enthusiasm, so she left feeling better than she was before. Even so, she glanced behind her nervously as she walked, not that it was terribly unusual for her. She tried to reassure herself by running over the plan in her mind.

They’d leave as soon as they were able to in the middle of the night. They’d go by train to Switzerland and, hopefully, never be seen again by anyone in their past.

It wasn’t much of a plan, she realized, but at least it was something.

She laughed breathlessly. She had almost gotten away with two of the biggest lies in her life and she would never see anyone again. Freedom was so close that she could almost taste it. It was bitter.

Her pace quickened until she was practically running and stopped only when she had bolted up the stairs to her apartment and shut the door. She felt almost lightheaded with excitement and nerves. Her breath caught and she stood for a few minutes, attempting to regain something that resembled composure. As soon as she was able, she walked quickly to the bedroom, pulled out her suitcase and started to take out her things to pack. “These will be terribly wrinkled,” she muttered under her breath, hastily folding a dress and putting it in the case. She checked the clock and judged that she didn’t have much time before her husband came home.

Although, she did have a little less time than she had bargained for. When she heard the door opening, she was caught off guard. Cefirina frantically shut the suit case, her trembling fingers fumbling with the locks. Just before she was found, she threw the suitcase into the closet, which, I suppose luckily for her, dragged her off balance.

“Cefirina, what’s all that noise in there?” Her husband, a tall dark man appeared in the doorframe, his eyebrows raised in an expression of mild disgust and disapproval.

“I fell,” she half lied, casting a glance to the suitcase. She took a quick breath and picked herself up. “Good evening, Friedrich.”

“Good evening.” Friedrich’s eyes traveled to the closet. He pointed at the suitcase. “What is that doing out?”

“I…My half-brother’s wife had a baby,” Cefirina invented quickly. “I was going to visit them.”

Friedrich put his hands on his face with a heavy sigh. I’m sure that he didn’t truly believe her, but tonight, he gave up the fight. “Go, then.”

Cefirina took the suitcase out and packed faster than she ever had. She felt as though if she made one wrong move, Friedrich would discover where she was going. Finally, she glanced behind her to discover that Friedrich had left her alone. Her gut clenched as she finished packing.

Cefirina took one last look around the bedroom. It was strangely sad. She couldn’ think of any happy times in the room, but she felt something like regret when leaving it. She nearly didn’t leave when she ran into Friedrich.

He was drinking by himself at the table with his glare fixed on the wall. Not a single word was exchanged between them. She only stared, then shifted the suitcase to her other hand, and walked out of the apartment. All the way to Nikolaus’s apartment, she wondered to herself about whether or not she should have said something. Even just a simple “so long” might have provided some closure or something.

“Whatever,” she told herself, digging her nails into her palm. “It doesn’t matter anyway. Just think, you’ve gotten away with the best lie of your life!” She kept up her mantra, trying to get optimistic for Nikolaus. She managed it, too, and arrived at his apartment with a smile.