Gunpowder and Perfume

shards of something like a soul
shatter at my feet

who I was
and what I am
perched precariously
on nothing

gunpowder and perfume
hang on my every word

tomorrow
and tomorrow
and tomorrow

ends here

Reviews

[terry smith]

And thus starts a brave new world...well written, you know I love the way your mind works!!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like the juxtaposition of gunpowder and perfume...

i can shoot you down, shoot you up my arm...or just die in the scent of you as tomorrow ends here...

love short pieces...less is more...and leaves more room for interpretation and individual relating to pieces.

nice work again.

jacob

[Baby Ricochet]

Gunpowder and perfume. Awesome. Okay I've read several poems of yours. Mostly because they're short and catchy. I like poems like that. I'm a little on the ADD side of life.

[Elizabeth]

Thanks for reading.

[Steven]

I always look before crossing the road, but then I don't look anymore. I think you must be perched on something though--being perched on nothing is saying nothing. But I dig the stimulating confrontation between gunpowder and perfume.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Tough and tender are a great combination, who says you can't be both.

[Kaylor Mason]

Nice. When some aspects of our lives explode, the entire world seems a desolated landscape of death and destruction. The stink of gunpowder is truly an ominous, completely unique feeling (I'm a shooter, and I know--trust me). I like how you used it here--it signifies the explosiveness beneath the surface of our cool, calm facade. We all have that, in some form or another

[Elizabeth]

Gunpowder is one of my favorite smells... I know a thing or two about it, as well :)

[Kaylor Mason]

Yeah, I know. Once you smell gunpowder for the first time, you'll never forget it. It's just like that, somehow

[Elizabeth]

Smells like my childhood. Makes me feel safe.

[Kaylor Mason]

I know what you mean :)

[koty bell]

great work i loved every line:)

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

That first line was so special it made me linger there and I had to start over again!

Love the repetition of tomorrow. It makes me feel that something has been promised that never has come, and that this is the day you step over it and begin. Just my take.

[Elizabeth]

Your take was right on. Thanks, doll :)

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

Great work!

[Brandon S. Whitten]

a gifted writer you are, such a way with words that seep into your pores and coil around your heart like a snake to a chalice.

[The Analog Kid]

I like how you used "gunpowder and perfume" to give the impression of lingering. "Something like a soul..." Nice and simply written.