Naomi's Poem

If it's over, you're just grasping straws

or keeping sand in both your palms.

So you'll clench fists tight

and never let go?

In the end though grains are gone

and you've nothing left but cuts and bruises.

Surely some will stay?

You'll be left with dust.

Dust and cuts and bruises are no cure for broken hearts.

Reviews

[S Sanders]

Love the last line and the concept of the poem. May I give my suggestion on the first line, though? The rest of the poem stands so strong and beautifully on its own that using "you're just grasping at straws" sounds watered down and weak in comparison to the other lines. Could you perhaps come up with a more unique phrase there? There is nothing wrong with it--per say--however, it could be considered cliche' by some. I liked reading this so much so that I look forward to seeing your other poems.