so-called home

I thought you were my home, guess I am homeless

I run into a brick wall in front of the house I was running to with enthusiasm.
I was going to make us coffee in the kitchen and talk about how happy I was
Did the locks change or did the owners move?
Or did I come to the wrong house?
I waited for someone to open the door and hug me
I pressed the bell and it rang
But they didn't open
Maybe they haven't heard
but i heard like there were voices coming from the house
maybe I heard wrong
You know, when you were a little kid, you played on the street and went home to drink water
The door did not open
I slept at the door of the house
The house collapsed on me
now i am homeless

Reviews

[A.H.]

the sense of being homeless or no one to come to, is a hard feeling to shake and live with. the write talks of past, present memories may be and has a heart in despair feel. it told like a story, so right in front of our eyes, that witnessing the scene evokes pain. well penned berenongur, thanks for sharing!

[Beren]

being homeless is not a lack of possessions,its a feeling. thank you so much for reading and paying attention but I am still mad at you for "what would I do" poem :D

[A.H.]

My pleasure, glad to read your poems and perspectives. haha, hope you shake off being made at me for "what would I do" poem. But, thanks so much for kind words. Best, Abhi.

[Samuel Dickens]

Rejection is a very bitter pill, whether it a real or metaphorical person. this makes me think of the unhappy parts of my childhood.

[Beren]

Sir I’m so sorry. This is about my family mainly, but even if I want to write something about a guy, love or etc. it turns into a family issue writing for me. I guess I feel that they are the main reason in me.

Thank you for reading, hope I can write happier things that will make you happy.

[August]

This is a poem that touches my heart..hope you'll find someone who'll open the door for you, day or night, someone who'll never break that home and keep you happy..

[Beren]

I can open the door for me anymore, and if I doesn’t have the keys, then it’s not my home.
Thank you for reading so much, you are loved more than you think.

[ashley]

oh my wow, this is such a heavy feeling & you've put it into such a great metaphor

[Beren]

I JUST SAW THIS! SORRY TWIN! thank you so much😭❤️

[Lisasview]

Oh gosh is this ever sad.
I love the house being the metaphor and I love metaphors.
Lisasview

[Beren]

i love metaphors too. thank you

[Marie]

A very poignant write finely inked. Excellent depiction of being homeless, it is an overpowering feeling of helplessness which consumes the heart, mind and spirit and you have superbly got it down on paper in this so sad poem. The ink of emotional pain flows freely throughout the poem until finally a collapse takes place. A very compelling poem, dear poetess. Thank you for sharing it...

[Beren]

Oh I just saw this review, it's strange. Thank you so much. Sometimes some things should get collapse, because maybe there is a better view on the street without that. Or maybe it was just visual pollution, or caused unnecessary crowded. Some things should go down.
Thank you for your review.

[Marie]

Most welcome always, Berenongur...

[Thomas W Case]

Powerful work. I've been there. Poignant writing.

[Beren]

sometimes the four walls that you consider your home can be a cage. I hope you found your happy place feels like "home". thank you so much for reading and paying attention. take care

[Soren]

Sad but identifiable both as a literal and metaphoric story. Wonderfully written.

[Beren]

thank you so much. thank you for reading. wishing you an amazing day.

[red93]

Really Fabulous Work how you conjure the heartache in this situation with well-chosen Words. Excellent ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

[Beren]

thank you so much. that means a lot. have the best day

[Arundass TP]

Oh. No... The last few lines framed is really horrifying. Why don't you break the door or window to peep into the house. Good writing

[Beren]

when the house is no longer a home, entering the house is no longer important. it may be better to stay under some things and let them collapse. maybe that "home" was destroying the view of that street.

thank you for reading and paying attention. hope you can always reach your home

[Arundass TP]

Thank you friend
Welcome 😁