best creature

when you lose everything about your past and pray to God for a way to hold on to life

it all went away

eating chocolates on the floor while watching cartoons

playing with logos and talking about half moons

all the old people belong my childhood is gone

but i was the only one who always won

flashbacks are coming when i try to move on

but only thing i can talk about is none

my period is late for weeks

my feeling are on the peaks

i'm scared of freaks

when it's all suddenly leaks…

i miss all of them, i miss my grands

i always feel regret when i looking at my hands

they all would be happy to see me in a white apron which doctors uses

does it matter if they see this on heaven?

i miss that yellow house

i have to raid the current owners

i hope the walls of the room where i hugged my father for the last time are not painted

they saw me so many times naked

how strange they were the only left behind

why am i thinking about the death all the time

for the first time of my life i'm hopeful and i'm working

it's not a good time for burning

so god if you are up there

i swear i love the life

found it very late dont take this from me now

even though i'm crying i'm not thinking giving up

there are just so many cups i want to buy

God if you are here, you know i'm matter

i'm not like who i was, i'm way better

i can make a change give me a chance

i'll be your best creature

your best part.

Author's Note

When I wrote this we had to sell a house that was full of memories from my family and I had lost all the people who were in that house, yet a person still finds something to live for, even if you miss it. And it's like a promise to God about filling the life he gave.

Reviews

[Vol]

berenonger,
I just read letters written by my sister-in-law's great, great grandfather while he was in the hospital to recover from wounds received in the battle of Gettysburg. She found them in a box of attic junk when her mom died... I believe Baby-boomers are the last generation without an abundance of photos... the few we still have only tell tiny bits of the story... your poem is valuable to your entire progeny for generations to come!
Vol

[berenongur]

I appreciate you sharing your story. The memories will always be a recall away in our minds. Thank you for your attention , wishing you a beloved day

[Lisasview]

Again your use of metaphors makes your poem wonderful.
I reread this one several times…
I stopped and read the part about your father and hoping they did not paint the walls….another metaphor….because painting the room would or could mean your father never existed…
I could go in and on breaking down this poem… because as you know by now… I love love love metaphors….
When my father was in his mid nineties and when he spoke to me ( still very clear!!) I would try to etch his face into my memory because I knew it might be the last time I might see him … he died when he was 96 years old.
Moving on is so difficult but well worth it.
Lisa

[berenongur]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sure those walls were never painted. I lost my father on my birthday when he was 46. A father is a father no matter how old he is. I hope you're right about moving forward. and thank you so much for sharing your ideas too. have the best day

[LVW]

I enjoyed it. thank you for sharing

[berenongur]

Thank you so much for reading

[Tumi]

so much emotions being poured out
loved the tone
it was poignant and perfect
with good imagery

[berenongur]

thank you so much. that is so sweet. wishing you the best day

[Arundass TP]

A great touching poem. Enjoyed reading

[berenongur]

Thank you so much for your attention. Have a lovely day

[Marie]

A very captivatingly penned poem, so nostalgic and overflowing with beautiful memories. It is also a prayer poem and I love how the poetess links into God, speaks to Him, knows he is listening and has a little chat about life with him. Memory is a gift of God that death cannot destroy and you have very beautiful memories of all your loved ones who once lived in the house. Your loved ones are always with you! Their love for you and your love for them links you with them and them with you. Nothing can ever change that and they will want you to live the very best version of life that you can, to be happy always. Poignant in the most beautiful way! I love this poem which comes straight from the poetess' beautiful heart, wrapped in love for her loved ones. Thank you so very much for sharing this amazing, eloquently penned poem. A privilege to read...

[berenongur]

This is the beautiful part about God's infinity, you know that he will always be there and that you can talk to him when you need him (even if you don't believe he is listening). And when you lose your loved ones, it is always better to reach out to the host and someone who knows where they are. Getting this support from him gives confidence. I am glad you liked it, I hope you found a beautiful piece of your life in my poem. I hope you always feel the presence of your loved ones by your side

[Marie]

Your comment is so beautifully poetic! Thank you so very much for sharing with me, dear poetess...