Moment of Clarity
I wake up staggering and stammering. People are laughing at my pointless chattering. The strong remnants of my hangover still lingers. I can barely feel my fingers yet I’m still able to palm it. I look down and I’m lying down in a pool of my own vomit. The liquor numbs my body and clouds my mind, while I ignore the damages it causes in time. My rum is done and it is difficult to swallow. Inside I feel empty and hollow, and in no time at all I will find more alcohol to help me wallow and drown in my own sorrow. Sometimes my stress becomes too much, so I turn to this vice as my crutch and pour out another glass and get smashed. The contents of my flask enable me to handle the difficult task of dealing with my past and escape this reality that I can’t seem to grasp. When I was younger and things were bad the only friends I had were Johnny Walker, Jack Daniels, and Jim Beam. I had already lost hope so they helped me cope and salvaged what was left of my self esteem. Whether it is peppermint Schnapps or top notch scotch whiskey, the alcohol helps uplift me to a place where my troubles can’t get me. When I stop drinking I start thinking of how many friends and jobs were lost to my obsession with Smirnoff. How by drowning in Moet did not end my troubles or erase my debt. Once I drop this dependency to Hennessy, maybe I will see that the whole world is not my enemy. I lived my life always asking why and how come when all along it was the Rum that kept me ignorant and dumb. Drinking these boozes only helped me to lose and that isn’t fair to me, I can see this now with my moment of clarity.