Calling a Truce

I know you don't want me now
And I feel the same about you
But fighting makes no sense anyhow
And it wastes our energies, too.

Don't you think it's time to cease
And declare a truce for good
We should instead be promoting peace
And doing the best we could.

Maybe you won't even hear me out
And I'm foolish these words to say
But I hope at some point you'll turn about
And look forward to a better day.

Copyright ©

Author's Note

Another attempt at rhyme.

Reviews

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

I sense an undercurrent of emotion between the lines that is absent from the words themselves. While you've put the words out there, they are bereft of feeling. Combine this with the obvious effort at forced rhyme, and the whole poem comes across faint.

Example: "We should instead be promoting peace and doing the best we could." The forced rhyme of could with good has led to bed grammar, since it should be "...the best we can."

The overall message is one that resounds with us all. You need to bring it to life by breathing a little bit of vigor into the words.

Linda Marie

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

good rhyme formation throughout~ as for the topic~ some just can't let go of the past and relive it endessly in ire instead of healing and moving forward~ a good write ~