dear diary

Fear consumes me as I still wish for him to hold me…to love me and call me his. The fear is not of him but of myself which seems too long for his touch as much as his mesmerizing words. Could he be perfect? I wish to feel his lips brush and soft but firmly take possession of mine and his arms wrapping around me leading them downward, pulling down my…wait no I mustn’t think like this. I am not this way for what good hath this  stranger bestowed upon me as I can’t find one. So I sit and ask myself “Why do I stay?” Could it be the fact he has danger in his eyes that seem to lure me in? Could it be the way his lips move and his voice when he calls my name? or could it be the secrets that I know he keeps? What about my own secrets…what about my forbidden love?