Mr Right

This was a poem for an ex boyfriend called danny, I dont like this one because i think its gone wrong maybe you can help me out by giving me some reviews !!

 

My Heart tells me things I want to hear,

But life gets hard and fills with fear,

As I search for Mr Right nothing comes into my sight,

But then one shiny sunny day my life just changes from sky’s so grey

 

I see your picture on the screen so bright

And finally say he could be Mr Right,

I never know what life will bring,

I just sit here wondering.

 

You look at me with such a glance

And I just think this could be my last chance,

I have been hurt as you may tell,

But with you here it’s all good and well.

Reviews

[EILEEN McGUINNESS]

This poem was very profound and written by a lady with a huge heart it showed wit,determination and offered the reader a good sense of how we must all learn from our past mistakes,there is no such thing as MR.RIGHT OR MRS .RIGHT it is making do with MR RIGHT & MRS RIGHT now,i liked the enjoyable rhyming and excellent flow of verses,you certainly have a talent and i look forward to reviewing more of your writing soon.
I think also it is wonderful to have a near neighbour on the same writing site with you up in hull and me down in the steel city.
Good luck with your future writing.Micky x

[Just Steffany]

hey tricky micky
thanks for the review. x

[Wildecat]

This is a beautiful poem, everyone needs someone. Nice write. Noticed one small typo. In the first line you have the word here I think you meant hear. Any liked this poem.

[Michael Kerr]

wow, such emotion just like the rest. i also look for that someone but always get crushed.
i have felt your pain great work.
keep write!

your friends,
-michael kerr-

[....]

Very well written
Like the emotion
involved with this write.

[.]

the first line it is 'hear' and not 'here' [edit it]

i liked it (:
keep it up

and i hope u get your Mr. Right .. it is difficult but not impossible
so good luck