Chapter One - New beginnings

Gazing up into tear filled green eyes despair overwhelms me.

“Is it an honour to be the couple who keeps the balance or a burden Camael?” I manage to croak out between the surges of pain.

“It is an honour Rahmiel. Our love can never be defeated. Yes it will be difficult but I will always find you even though I will not have the help from our true form. My love for you is greater than any powers they can take away from us” My sweet Camael still trying to be optimistic even through these heart wrenching times. A soft kiss graces my head and I am able to force a smile in his direction hoping to ease the pain from his beautiful face.

“I know that. But in our next life we will not know our mission; we won’t know why we are here”

“Yes we will. The reason for living and my mission will always be you, not to keep the balance but to love and protect you” Relief floods me, I want to reciprocate his feelings but a new tremor of pain has me cringing. I can feel my heartbeat becoming weaker; I’m not ready to go yet.

“Stay with me Rahmiel, just five more minutes. I love you. Do not ever forget it” I push the darkness away to try and grant him this last wish.

“I love you too. Promise me you will find me and not let me go Camael” I want to explain to him how much I am going to miss him and that I am grateful for the time I have had with him but my body is shutting down on me, tremors wrack through me but I try not to show Camael how much it hurts.

“I promise, I will never let you go sweetheart” He leans down and softly kisses my lips. It tastes salty from both of our tears. I inhale my last breath with Camael’s lips on mine, I scream out in my mind that I love him but the words refuse to pass my lips before darkness surrounds me.

     Shooting up in bed I can feel the desolation from my dream still lingering in my mind.  It’s been the same for the last four years, not always the same dream but the same names and voices, only once I wake I can never remember his face no matter how much I long to.

“Rise and shine Raquel. Coffee is ready downstairs for you” My mum’s cheerful voice brings me out of my internal musings. Collapsing back onto my bed I am reminded that today is moving day. I knew this day would come but oh how I have been praying to avoid it.  I may only be moving half an hour away to the town of Darlington but this house is my home. I can still feel my Dad’s presence here even after four years of him being gone.  I choke back a sob; I am going to be further away from him than I have ever been before.

     As my foot hits the bottom step the aroma of freshly made coffee infiltrates my senses and almost brings me to my knees, I am going to miss my mum and our morning routine. Rounding the corner I am greeted by a warm smile and a cup of coffee. I sit across from her and take in her appearance. Her chocolate brown hair is styled up and her makeup is done to perfection. She is already dressed in a pair of denim jeans and t-shirt, a quick glance at the clock reveals it is only half past five am.

“Wow you’re ready early” I say while raising my eyebrows. Her cheeks redden as she clears her throat.

“I’m just going out for breakfast at eight, I thought I’d get ready early so I’m not rushing later” I smirk at her. Yeah right she has a date.  Grinning I pick up my coffee and take a sip while keeping my eyes trained on her.

“Ok you got me, I’m going out with Jeff for breakfast” A beaming smile lights her face up.  Even though he is not my dad I am pleased for her, she deserves to be happy and I would never begrudge her of that.

“Well I hope you have a good time, I’m off to go get ready and finish packing my room, thanks for the coffee mum” Turning my back I race up the stairs with a smile planted firmly on my face, my mum has more of a social life than I do.

     An hour and a half later and I am finally ready to leave with my black Vauxhall Astra stuffed full of boxes and bags.  Hands on my shoulders force me to turn around, I try to wipe the tears away but I am too late.  My mum wipes underneath my eyes and sighs.

“Relax Raquel it’s going to be ok. You’re going to go out there and start living your life, you deserve to have a bit of fun and it’s what your Dad would want” I nod. She’s completely right. I know first-hand how life can be ripped away from you within the blink of an eye and here I am just letting mine pass me by. I need to stop putting my mum through this heart break too. It was bad enough that her husband was taken from her never mind her daughter turning into a recluse too. 

“I’m just going to miss you” I say while diving into her arms. I don’t care what anyone else says, a mums cuddle can cure anything. She chuckles while hugging me back.

“I’ll see you on Saturday” I nod then pull away to climb into my car.  I catalogue the view before me of my mum stood outside of my childhood home and smile to myself, time to join the real world I think to myself.

     Thirty minutes later and I am pulling up in front of a white four story building. Putting the car in park I inhale a deep breath before climbing out to begin the hum drum of unpacking. A loud rumbling indicates that Az has just pulled up on his red Harley Davidson. I jump when he slaps me on the bottom but before I can playfully hit him back he jumps out of the way. Grinning at me like a fool he tosses my new apartment keys at me.

“You missed me gorgeous?” I don’t answer his question and instead shove a box into his waiting hands.

“You’re late” I grumble whilst trying to keep a straight face. He scowls at me which forces my grin out.

“Do you want my help or not? ‘cause if you do then you better play nice” I stick my tongue out at him before opening up the door and darting up the stairs.

“Yeah you better run” I hear him yell behind me followed by a laugh. Unpacking should be interesting.

     Five hours later and we are finally done.  I take a moment to appreciate my new home.  All the walls are magnolia with dark brown laminate flooring. Each item of furniture is black. I suppose to everyone else it would look quite plain but to me it looks very serene and I can just envision that my new home will become my sanctuary alongside my old bedroom at my mums. Huh. I never expected myself to refer to the new apartment as home and my old house as my mum’s, maybe she was right and this new beginning is exactly what I need.

“Damn it. Parents are always right” I say exasperated.

“Huh?” I glance over to Az to see what has him so distracted; he is looking at one of the drawings I finished last week. It’s of a tree placed in front of a lake. I have never personally seen it except for in my dreams but I had an unexplainable desire to draw it.

“When did you go here?” I can’t hear the emotion that is in his voice but if I had to guess I would say it was anger. Worried that I had done something to upset him I quickly explain.

“I haven’t. I just dreamt it and thought it was beautiful so I drew it. Why?” His features soften leaving me confused.

“No reason” He walks over to the kitchen and flicks the kettle on. “Want to go for something to eat after a coffee” I am over run with exhaustion but I don’t want to diminish the hopeful look he has so I smile and nod in agreement instead.

     The Copper Beach is a local pub, its only ten minute walk from home which is very ideal.  When Az told me it was one of his favourite places to go I was sceptical.  You have to know Az to understand why but to summarise it, Az isn’t known for visiting up standing establishments. So to say it was a surprise not to see scantily clad woman falling out the door drunk even if it is only one in the afternoon would be an understatement. There are two doors to enter one for the bar and the other for the restaurant section, we take the latter. The room is decorated in red and the furniture is dark mahogany, I can feel my beaming smile and can understand why Az likes this place so much. A nudge in my side brings my attention to Az who is grinning like a fool.

“Expecting something different weren’t you?” I give him a non-committal response and leaving him stood chuckling. Taking our seats I begin to scour the menu when Az points out that they do the world’s best lasagna here so I order that. I glance up in time to see Az watching the waitress’s hips sway as she walks away. I make a noise of disgust which does not seem to faze him.

“What” he shrugs.

“Seriously can you not give it a rest for five minutes?” A wicked gleam brightens his eyes, Uh oh.

“Is that a bit of jealousy I detect Raquel?” I snort at him in amusement.

“Jealousy of the blonde bimbo who is about to find out what the biggest man w***e is really like” I glance at my watch “in about eighteen hours” I laugh at the absurdity of it. See the truth is I am not oblivious to Az’s good looks. It’s the dimple he has when he smiles that makes my knees wobble. Add the dimple to the full head of dark hair, dark mysterious eyes, stubble and the body of god then you’re just asking to be a mushy puddle on the floor. The added bonus I have is that I know what he is really like. Sure he’s handsome and can seem like a right gentlemen but come the morning he sends you packing without so much as a goodbye kiss.

“You've gone all googly eyed on me again” he chuckles. Crap this is why I don't think about him like that when he’s here, he'll get the wrong impression. “Are you sure you don't want to outline our friendship boundaries again?”

“Nope I’m good thank you” I can feel the blush flaming my face so I remove my gaze from him while thinking that the food can’t come quick enough.

     I am reminded of how much of a good friend Az is over the course of dinner. We share stories and laugh over a few drinks after food; I bask in the enjoyment I am feeling at this moment.  Truthfully I never thought our friendship would reach this level when we first met.  Az had been dating and I use that term loosely, an old colleague of mine when I worked in a café in Middlesbrough. At first I had ignored him and attempted to brush him off. In the end he proposed that if he made me smile at least three times within the hour then I had to talk to him, if he didn’t then he would leave me alone. There was no way I was going to let the opportunity pass me by. Now three and a half years down the line and he has turned out to be my best friend.

Author's Note

Please ignore grammar problems and take into account I have only just wrote this and not had much time to make changes. I just want to make sure I am on the right track for now.

Reviews

[Ars Goetia Poetry]

This is really good, thanks for sharing :)

[A. Amos]

I find it interesting and looking forward to read more of your work..

[Nusquam Esse]

I would need to see more chapters to properly critique this, but it seems good so far. My main suggestions on this would be to not have Camael's name during the dream sequence, simply because it feels more surreal that way; and better matches the whole "can't remember" aspect. I would also look and see if there is a way you can make your intro paragraph more compelling, or simply add in an additional one which really piques interests right off the bat. As is, it is not quite strong enough to open a novel with (strong enough to hold, but not to seize attention) So far the character interactions seem strong, feel free to RR me any further chapters, and I will see what I can suggest. It is as novels progress that issues become more glaringly obvious.