Freckles

Constellation marked skin

     Dots that sprinkle a pale surface

Eyes that promise sin

     Lips that quirk up with a purpose

Dots that sprinkle a pale surface

     A promise hidden in a grin

Lips that quirk up with a purpose

     My head’s caught in a spin

A promise hidden in a grin

     Words whispered in my ear

My head’s caught in a spin

     I’ve lost all my fear

Words whispered in my ear

     I never want to stop

I’ve lost all my fear

     I feel like I’m on top

I never want to stop

     You can see into my soul

I feel like I’m on top

     Only you can make me whole

You can see into my soul

     Eyes that promise sin

Only you can make me whole

     Constellation marked skin

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Many fun & clever devices used in your poem. First, I love that you've managed to describe something as mundane as freckles, using a fresh, unique phrase: constellation-marked skin (by the way, a 2-word descriptor usually needs to be hyphenated). I love the playfulness of your piece. The writing itself seems to start out slowly, but then speeding up & speeding out of control, which mirrors the meaning: "I never want to stop" . . . Thanks for saying something about freckles that hasn't been said yet! *smile*

[JKRyder]

Nice repetiton. It works well with what your telling. I liked it.