Public Shaming Prize

This is for a contest about cars that I don't think I'm going to win. But hopefully the public shaming prize will be mine! :D

Public Shaming Prize, I must Have You: A Haiku

 

Public shaming prize

We are destined to be one

Because I like soup

 

Or if you would prefer a less haiku-ish way of expressing it….

 

Public Shaming Prize, I Must Have You: A long winded poem about nothing

 

Public shaming prize

I saw you there.

You are lonely, like me

But I bet your toes don’t look like small goldfish

Unlike me.

I have dreamed of you since I saw you

A whole six minutes ago.

I wonder:

Do you like soup?

And large macadamia nuts?

And listening to the wind on a windless day?

I hope you do.

Because I don’t.

And two opposites attract,

Much like the ground attracts my face to it.

Much like fire attracts the bugs

Who die there.

If they had voices, would the scream in pain, or laugh in pleasure?

It matters not.

I’m having too much fun with this poem, public shaming prize.

Please do not think ill of me.

It started off as a way to win you,

To win your heart.

But now,

Now I realize

That I wrote this not for you, but for myself

And all the dolphins that are frequenting Writer’s Café.

And also because I have never had a car problem in my life

For who would trust me behind the wheel?

You laugh, public shaming prize,

But you did not witness me run over that old…

Orange cone.

I killed a cone that day.

But enough of that.

I have wasted your time.

I must leave before the clock strikes 4:44

Because then I will turn back into an awkward teenage girl

Who did not win the public shaming prize

And does not have a can of condensed tomato soup.

Will you wait for me, public shaming prize?

Or have I already

Scared you

Away?

Fin.

Author's Note

Is it worth a public shaming prize????

Reviews

[John Phoenix Hutchinson..]

What a crap poem you should be ashamed! I rated it 001 I would of given it 000 but it would not let me! The most dire line without a shadow of a doubt was 'Because I like soup'! I mean surely soup has no place whatsoever in our lyrical art. Dolphins I can understand but I have never met any in Writers Cafe so whats that about! Dont even get me started on Macadamian nuts!
Go express your hormones else where young lady.............hey Writers Cafe peeps I want my 1 rating point back!! Dont you dare 'feature' this review, I dont want the haters on my arse!

[DrD]

Too late

[Becca Bishop]

Wow, I hope the people in charge of this contest respond like this!!!! I'll get that public shaming prize for sure!!! Thanks!!!

[Marie Anzalone]

As it happens young lady I do like soup, and I am proud I like soup, and you made me not just smile or chuckle today but outright guffaw. Alas the public shaming prize for my important contest was taken, so I made up one just for you. Enjoy. :-)

[Becca Bishop]

A prize just for me??? You shouldn't have!!! (Actually, you definitely should have. Now you can sleep safely tonight knowing I have no reason to hunt you down and....) Thanks for giving me an opportunity to get in tune with my absurd and nutty side :D :D :D :D :D And thanks for the review!!!!

[J. Write]

Wow!! You sure can write a lot of crap for all the dolphins that are frequenting Writer’s Café. :)

Its not worth a public shaming prize because even in your biggest attempt to make it shameful, it's brilliant.

[Becca Bishop]

:P believe it or not but writing crap is my specialty ;P The stuff I've previously posted up here has been read and approved by a sane person. Thanks for the review :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D (you get a lot of smiley faces ;P)

[Sid]

Wow, Becca this is absolutely crazy and absurd and I agree with John Phoenix Hutchinson, this is definitely the first time I've read the word soup in a poem, damn. I have to ask, how in the name of God did you come up with this and sorry don't have much else to say, kind of speechless here!!

[Becca Bishop]

Whoopee!!!! :D :D :D

[lothlorienwriter]

Much like the ground attracts my face to it.

This line express's my feelings about your "alleged" poem.

[DrD]

Despite the lunacy required for this piece, you are incredibly original and a delight to read. I sincerely mean that, Becca. Please don't ever lose that element of your personality because it makes you who you are and who we wish we were. Thank you for this fine example of how absurd we can all be at times.

[Becca Bishop]

Thanks DrD!!!! You just made my bad day so much better :P I hope I gave you something to laugh or at least smile at :D Thank you for your wonderful review; you're the best!!!! (And you're absolutely right about absurdity :P we all have it)