Angel's Rain

I think rain is something we all share an interest in. Not only because of the petrichor but also because there's something unspeakably magical about it.

I thought I heard the moaning wind

From the quiet where I lay

I thought I heard the crying storm,

Alone that darkened day.

 

I thought as murderous clouds appeared

Too late to run away

And then as bristling howl began

I couldn’t help but stay.

 

If falling rain is angels’ tears

And snow the angels’ dreams

Then what could the unearthly storms

To heaven’s angels mean?

 

I thought I heard the tired wind

From where I sat alone

Perhaps the anger from above

Or something else unknown.

 

I thought as vibrant purple hues

Pushed the storm away

Why the glowing angel’s tears

Had bathed the world today.

 

If anger yields the darkest thoughts

And sorrow brings on pain

For what reason then did angels weep,

And call upon the rain?

Author's Note

So when I was in fourth grade, my teacher told me I couldn't rhyme worth beans and to stick with a more mathematical career in the future. Alright, so I'm aware that "Crater Lake" doesn't exactly rhyme with "climbing a gate" but I was eight for goodness sake! Is my rhyming really that bad? Are there any pointers you'd be willing to give on how to get the perfect rhyme? Yes? Yes?

Reviews

[PenPaperProse&Poem]

Becca,
I think your "beans" are breathtaking!
I'm a 63 yr old grandmother and I love your poetry.

Very much a newcomer to this 'Cafe', I didn't really think it was a good 'fit' for me until I found Angel's Rain, Sometimes I Feel Like .... and Let's Pretend. Most other works I read here were quite 'down-hearted' or angry or completely discouraging. Of course there is a place for all of that, but I tend to prefer more cheerfull pieces in the majority of my reading/writing.

I have been writing for MANY years, prose and poetry, songs and melody. While I have a fairly open mind, I PREFER works that are uplifting, positive pieces that help readers to feel good about themselves, their environment, other people and about our opportunity to share life on the blue marble we call Earth. I get that sense from your beautiful words and outlook. Please keep it up.

There are still some fourth-grade teachers who "don't know BEANS" about poetry or about teaching children! You may have had one of those. Sorry about that! I'm glad you didn't let her/him permanently discourage you from writing.



Sorry for 'rambling' I love your poetry, I'll be back for more and will share some of my own very soon.

Hooray for the FFA!
:o)

[Becca Bishop]

Thank you soooo much! I can't tell you what it means to me to have someone actually take the time to look over my work and then take even more time to sit down and right out such a thoughtful reply. I had to drag my mom in here to read this and I couldn't stop squealing. Score one for not writing about depressing things all the time!!! By the way, I loved the way you described Earth as a "blue marble". It made me laugh! So thanks again so very, very much!!!!!

[PenPaperProse&Poem]

You're very welcome. Good work needs to be encouraged. I'm glad to see there were others here who recognize the beauty in your poetry. Keep it up, I know your mom must be very proud of you. Keep up the 'positive spirit' in your poetry. There will be times in your life when you have good reason to temporarily write about those issues that are not so positive, but I would say, no need to go to the 'dark side' until the need arrises :o)
We need more happiness in life.

[Shreyas Tripathy]

Firstly, amazing poem and startling imagery !!!
And secondly, of course, I didn't seem to find out why you think you cannot rhyme because this one rhymes perfectly :)
Still if you need advice, I'd give one to you, 'cause its free...
When I find it difficult to rhyme, I just write my thoughts in a three line stanza with none rhyming to each other, then I try to figure out what is missing from this thought, then carefully make it rhyme with either the second line (for and abcb rhyming pattern) or if it rhymes with none I try to make it a last line rhyming process(like did in my poem Memories)

[Shubham's View]

Oddly rhythmic, I've got to try and give it a tune, "Guitar, where art thou?", Sheesh, where's something when you actually need it?
And 4th grade? My my, we have a child prodigy in our hands.
As for the pointer, whatever soothes your brain!

[Becca Bishop]

Thanks! And by child prodigy I assume you mean "Woah, someone who knew how to construct reasonably intelligent sentences like you're taught to in school!" That's right. Be amazed. I hope you find your guitar and that it wasn't eaten by ravenous bowls of chili...although if that does happen tell me right away because it sounds pretty awesome :P

[Shreyas Tripathy]

Agreed !! XD

[rnuff]

If falling rain is angels’ tears
And snow the angels’ dreams
Then what could the unearthly storms
To heaven’s angels mean?

Deep profound image is installed here.
very prolific. Awesome!

[Becca Bishop]

Thank you very much!! :)

[JayBird]

I thought your rhyming was fine! The phrasing, word use, and imagery in your poem turned what can be so simple a thing into an item of beauty.

[Becca Bishop]

Thanks!!! I'm glad you didn't totally hate it :D Thanks for the encouragement!!