AN OUTRAGEOUS CRY

The inner demons of a girl who has been sexually abused as a child by her father figure.

When you first called me to you
With that sickly sweet smile
Your voice dripping with honey
I didn't know you were calling me to my
DOOM!
Everytime you showered me with presents
I only saw a loving man
A loving father figure in you
Who will protect and cherish me
for whole my life
But in the dark abyss of the nights
When people failed to notice
You crept into my bed with me
And lifted my little dotted frock.
Little girl I was
Didn't know what was happening
Except the man whom she idolized
The man who was her hero
Doing something that felt WRONG
To my little heart.
When he lied down beside me
And pushed my thighs apart with his knees
I didn't know I was being violated.
Just that daddy didn't want me to
talk to anyone About it.
He gave me anything and everything
Sweets chocolates and dolls
Everything my little heart wanted
By taking something back From me.
From a baby girl of 3 years old.
He RIPPED my pink frock off of me
And pressed himself into me
Little girl wondered
Why she was SO VERY SAD
When daddy told her everything he
did was to love her.
Little girl grew sadder and sadder
She spent her time crying
without knowing the reason
And once she thought to tell her mamma.
Then remembered that all daddy
WANTED
Was her HAPPINESS.
So she kept mum and lied still
When he RIPPED her frocks.
Little girl grew and I was no more little girl
When I got away from daddy
I was glad eventhough I didn't know why
Then as time passed
As I realized what happened
My mind got burned
All those fairytales
Colorful rainbows
Dreams and flowers and butterflies
Everything a LIE
My beautiful heart broken
My trust and faith
Broken into pieces.
Pieces which bled
Sharp,jagged,painful ends.
Once little girl I was
Still lives my life
Only to survive
I fight.I defend.
Rude and arrogant.
Still in the depths of sleepless nights.
I lie on the covers of my bed
Scared...worthless.
You have NO IDEA what you did to me
I want to SCREAM
But I kept quiet
For those who love me still.
A love that is as pure and
unconditional as it comes.
So I suffered silently.
You DESTROYED me,I cried
You RIPPED my dotted pink frock apart.
You SQUASHED my soul into nothing
You SHREDDED it into pieces.
Oh man!I hope you will rott in hell.
Even the deepest pits wont be enough
Cruelest punishments wont be enough
For you not only destroyed a childhood.
But also a present and future of a girl.
A girl who cries herself into sleep
A girl who never escaped nightmares
A girl whose bright world you
plunged into darkness
A girl who fight for survival
A girl who DESPERATELY want to be happy
But is unable to.
A girl who cringes even at casual touches.
A girl who you destroyed.
Because its you I see
Everytime I try to be happy
Everytime I fake a smile
Everytime I mentally cringe around people
I'm swearing this in my own blood
Oh man!You WILL suffer.
You will suffer like no one else.
You will suffer terribly.
For all your sins.
For all your deceiving.
Man..You are going to SUFFER

Author's Note

Honest reviews and constructive criticisms are more than welcome.

Reviews

[Mirra]

I'm not good in constructive criticisms, as for honest review this just awed me. I've seen and read the same stories and I always end up with the angry feeling and the wants of killing or punishing the shameless criminals. Fathers should be the one who will protect their daughters, they are the children's first king and hero. This work is just fantastic, it had intense emotions which made me read until the last words. Incredible work!

[Endeavor]

What an extremely moving piece! I feel so sorry for the girl, but at the same time enthralled by the power of her conviction at the last verse. Thank you for sharing this wonderful work!

[Sky]

Thanks Endeavor.Glad you liked it.And don't feel sorry for her.She hates pity :-)

[Endeavor]

Oh, my apologies...why feel sad about someone who has this kind of strong spirit? You are welcome. :-)

[Sky]

Exactly.. :-D

[Madalyn Beck]

Woah. This is just.... Wow. You have rendered me speechless! This is fantastic! You have told a story so intense and heartbreaking, but the anger and vengeance you have written was made real within me. I cannot even express fully how excellent of a write this is. Fantastic work. Truly. xo (:

[Madalyn Beck]

By the way, Chelsea sent me here and I'm glad she did!

[Sky]

Thank you for liking it.It took a lot of courage from my side tp put this one out in open cuz,well..This is a slam poetry and it was my first try writing a slam.

[Madalyn Beck]

That is awesome! I applaud you! I have always wanted to do a slam but have never had the opportunity. I'm sure you did a fantastic job! (:

[Sky]

I'm glad it reached out to people.Writing a slam is much more hard than writing a poem.Because if it does not touch the heart of the audience..It will be nothing.And I'm happy this one worked.

[Konigin]

WOW. I am speechless. I am burned raw with anger. I am awed at her bravery. I want to kill this man. You have recorded here something that happens all too often. You are amazing. Bravo.

[Sky]

Thank you..Quite frankly I was burning with raw anger too..While I was writing it.It is not fair.For a girl to be broken like that.That too by someone who was supposed to protect her.

[Konigin]

Absolutely! It isn't fair and it should never have happened to begin with!

[Perdition]

A Stunning write...This stolen innocence and trust that you've penned with such powerful emotion. Your friend must have found a confusing solace in your gift of voice. It takes tremendous talent to be able to put yourself into such a horrific position and write down these words that MUST be said for the betrayal of her childhood.
You have given a wonderful gift in this healing scream that must have touched the very ledge of her terror and pain. There is just so much anger and confusion of emotional disruption in this poem written for her stolen youth. To live in "cringes even at casual touches" is simply unforgivable when caused by the very one who should be protecting and nourishing that ability.
You've given great light of poetic "action", though I am certain she must still have a long road ahead toward healing .
You are a true friend and rare talent as this MUST have been just a colossal decision and undertaking. You've written a wondrous good Sky.

[Sky]

Thanks a lot..I feel really good hearing you say mention it as a "healing scream".And healing was my primary motive behind writing this. :-)

[Perdition]

Healing is one of the most primary reasons for writing in most stages of poetry. Even at the very beginning of love there is a voice we know as we fear the nature of its uncertainty. However...this "scream" was a voice that you chose and it has empowered a healing process over such an unbelievable betrayal quite well. Your friend is quite fortunate to have your care and it is a start. Just so sorry and angry that such things exist~

[Sky]

Life not supposed to be fair..So..Things happen.What we can do is survive and help others survive :-)

[Perdition]

So we have an accord. I just get pissed over the abusive pain of children. Sounds like your friend is is a testament of strength...and your poem, a vigilant voice. Thank you for the compliments of kind to my reviews. A drink is only as strong as the poet.

[Norma Padro]

I like this one. It's very sad, because not all little girls are able to share such experiences with anyone. Turning into a woman afterwards is very difficult too. I can relate to this. It takes more work to stay sane than it does to deal with the past experiences. It's a very touching poem.

[Sky]

Thanks Dear..It was a hard thing for me to publish this one for reviews.

[Norma Padro]

Hello. It becomes easier. Just keep writing. Congratulations on your achievements. Stay safe.

[Sky]

I will.Thank you.You too :-)

[Dark Heart of Winter]

Very couragous of you to write this. It's not easy bringing those demons onto the paper, even when they are someone else's demons. Good job.

[Sky]

Thank you..I'm glad it reached to you.

[Devesh]

I feel sorry for your friend after reading this poem, no one deserves to go through this. It's disgusting how some people take advantage of a child's innocence, only to render them broken and afraid: the fear must be horrifying, I can't even imagine. You did a great job giving a voice to your friend, poems like these tend to have a healing touch to them...writing can sometimes take away a part of the pain. Kudos to you! Just a small error I noticed while reading: You should write 'quiet' instead of 'quite' in this line : "But I kept quite ". Great effort, all in all!

[Sky]

Thanks for pointing out the error.I wrote this in a flash.So didn't edit it.And thanks for your understanding too.Like you said.When a girl is violated by a family member,Her entire life takes a downfall.Her trust.Belief in humanity.Everything.I just gave her a voice.

[Devesh]

Your voice is beautiful, keep writing! You're welcome :)

[Sky]

Thank you. :-) I will try. :-)

[Devesh]

:)) + some more words for 10 characters :P

[Sky]

Huhh..what?10 characters? I don't get it.

[Devesh]

There has to be a minimum of 10 characters in any comment. :)

[Sky]

Lol...That..Funny :-D

[William Wapi]

Painful thing to imagine, really. I have a friend who went through such an ordeal only in her case it was her teacher. To this day she still gets nightmares of the man. Heartbreaking poem Sky.

[Sky]

Thank you.I wrote this for a friend too.She wanted me to voice her pain.So I did.

[William Wapi]

And you did a great job there. It's not easy getting someone's feelings and putting them into words.

[Sky]

Thanks William :-) Your kind words matters a lot :-)