Recurring Despair

A Poem by Arte Por Vida

Started back at the beginning of August.. Finished on October 6, 2011 About my mom..

Out of the fridge
Into your hands
Now I’m in danger
Along with everyone else

You sit right back down
Pull back the silver tab
Open is the can
Broken is my respect

A sip is taken
Several more follow
Your comprehension level is falling
My tolerance disappearing

Words begin to slur
Ears become drowned
Whispering becomes screaming
Closing become slamming

Sour taste on the tongue
Bitter ringing in every tone
After awhile there is silence
But not in my mind

You’re passed out
But not in your bed
Either in the chair
Or on the floor somewhere

This hurts me
As well as the others
But you don’t seem to care
For this happens each night

Never breaking the chain
Except a random apology
For the stupid things you do
That ends up meaning nothing

Patience may help
But it won’t fix
The problem at hand
Only give temporary calm

The drinking continues
As does the yelling
Harsh words explode
Most things don’t change

The pain increases
Temptation ever rising
Holding back gets harder
Shattering gets easier

Tears creep down
Leaving a wet salty trail
And a pool on the pillow
Filled with unending despair

Time like this
Are broken ones
Where I am scattered
All around the room

I leave them lie
But just for a bit
Then pick them back up
And put me together

The glue isn’t super
I’ll break apart again
But for now I’m composed
Just to get though the day