Peace In Our Time

A day in the life of a guy trying to make the world a better place.

Peace in Our Time

 

The Abramovs are a large family living in a small apartment in the Bronx.  The two-bedroom apartment houses Jerry Abramov, a psychologist who teaches at Bronx Community College, Shirley Abramov, an artist, and their three children, Fred 14, Rachel 11 and Jordan 7.  The Abramovs recently installed a curtain in the second bedroom to provide Rachel some privacy from her two brothers.  All five Abramovs depend on the one bathroom in the apartment, which is a perennial source of stress and conflict, especially in the mornings. 

 

Jerry Abramov specializes in social psychology and group process; the ongoing experiment of being cooped up in a tiny apartment provides an inexhaustible supply of data on how groups can dysfunction.  Shirley runs her calligraphy business out of the apartment, so half of the living room is devoted to her materials and writing desk.  She is having increasing difficulty with her eyesight as the demands of her work require her to stare at small print for hours on end and there is an increasing likelihood that she will have to stop working soon if her eyesight gets any worse.  The upside of this development is that it may create a little more space in the apartment; the downside is that their income will be cut by a third and they are already struggling with keeping up with the high cost of living in New York. 

 

Jerry prepares breakfast for the family in the galley kitchen that is his favorite place in the apartment.  He fancies himself a short order cook and sets the stove ablaze while he scrambles eggs, loads the toaster and zaps some bacon in the microwave.  Timing is essential, the toast, eggs and bacon have to arrive at their respective dishes at almost the same time so that they are all at their flavorful best.  Jerry pushes down the toaster as he dumps the eggs into the sauté pan and turns on the microwave.  As he scrambles he also loads up his and Shirley’s coffee cups and pours OJ for the kids; Fred will want some coffee as well but Jerry leaves that to him to prepare since he takes a lot of sugar and Jerry wants nothing to do with this.  Jerry reaches into the shoulder high cabinet and takes down three, then two dishes.  The eggs are just getting to the point where they are creamy and Jerry is determined to plate them before they get hard and dry.  He butters the toast and quickly divides the eggs between the 5 dishes, then covers the bacon with a paper towel to degrease.  Dropping 2 strips of defatted bacon over each pile of scrambled eggs, which lay on a bed of buttered toast, Jerry brings his breakfast assemblage to the table and distributes the required cutlery to each table setting.  He brings over the coffee and juices and a jar of imported cherry preserves and goes to rally Shirley and the kids from their morning preparations to insure that they get to their eggs before they get cold.

 

Having mustered the family to the breakfast table, Jerry settles down to enjoy the fruits of his labors.  He asks Fred, who is cultivating a soul patch in celebration of his recent entry into the cult of shaving, how he did on his algebra test.  Fred mumbles something that Jerry cannot entirely decipher; he asks Fred to please speak up and answer the question.  Fred says that he thought he had done fine on the test and Jerry congratulates him for having done a good job of preparing for it.  Fred mumbles something else and goes off to prepare his coffee.  Jerry turns to Rachel and asks her about her science project.  Shirley interjects that Rachel is making progress and that Jerry should stop putting pressure on her.  Jerry responds that he was just checking in and Shirley says that Rachel is a good student and will ask for help if she needs it.  Rachel remains very focused on cutting up her scrambled eggs and Jerry backs off;  he turns to Jordan and offers to play catch with him in the backyard when he gets home from work.  Jordan says that he has a play date with his friend Elliott that afternoon but would love to play catch tomorrow if Jerry can do it then.  Jerry says “Great” and returns to his breakfast feeling some relief that at least one of his offspring shows some appreciation for his interest in them.

 

While Shirley cleans up the mess that Jerry created while carrying out his short order wizardry, Jerry uses his precious bathroom access time to shower and shave and get ready for work.  Jerry loves his job; being a professor is a very rewarding experience for him.  He loves the student’s curiosity about psychology, especially as it applies to them.  And he loves being the guru, the fount of knowledge that can tell them all about themselves and the forces that drive them to do what they do.  He runs much of his class as a small group experiment, using what happens in the classroom as grist for the lessons he is teaching.  This makes the learning very immediate and relevant and the learning experience emotionally alive.  So getting ready for work is a pleasure,  and he glides through his morning ablutions thinking about what is to come in his day.

 

Dressed in his usual work uniform of jeans, penny loafers and a button down Brooks Brothers shirt, Jerry prepares to leave for school, bestowing a quick kiss on each of his offspring and stopping for a more flavorful smooch with Shirley before bolting out of the apartment to catch the subway to Bronx Community.  On the train, he studies his class notes to prepare the lessons he hopes to draw out of the group session that will start his workday.  His goal is to find opportunities to make points about his most recently assigned reading as events emerge in the students’ interactions with each other.  While this approach makes Jerry’s classes much less controllable, since he can never predict where things will go, he feels that the risk is well worth the cost since the lessons that emerge are much more immediate and meaningful. 

 

As is almost always the case on New York subways, Jerry remains entirely oblivious to what is going on in his railway car; he studiously avoids eye contact with any of his fellow passengers and absorbs himself entirely in his classroom preparation and the music that is filling his mind through his earphones.  As a result, any interesting lessons in group dynamics that might be playing out in the subway car are totally lost on him.

 

Jerry automatically stands up as his station approaches and gathers his things together to leave the train.  He bumps into another passenger who is also getting up to leave and quickly apologizes, although he is no more at fault than is his co-passenger.  But why look for trouble?  He quickly departs the train and runs up the station stairs and out into the morning sunshine.   He goes directly to his office, showing his ID and passing through the school security without a hitch.  As he settles down, he does a short meditation to center himself and get ready for his first class.  

 

Entering his classroom, Jerry looks around to see who has arrived early, thinking these are the students who really want to be here.  His classes tend to be very diverse, with lots of racial, age and ethnic variety.  This makes the group discussions very animated, as the differences manifest themselves in beliefs, norms and assumptions that stem from differences in background, life experience and cultural variation.  Some of the early arrivals wear suits and ties, indicating that their educational aspirations are squeezed into full time workdays.  Others arrive in more typical collegiate and urban uniforms, ranging from muscle shirts and short shorts to chinos and Polo shirts. 

 

The class sits in a circle and Jerry starts things off with a greeting and a question: “What’s going on today?”  He then remains silent through the initial quiet as the students wait for someone to start the conversation that will constitute the first half of the class meeting. 

 

The agenda for this part of the class is to address whatever is happening in the group in the current moment.  George, a tall, muscular black student speaks first:  “I’m really tired of just sitting around talking about nothing.  When are we going to learn something useful in this class?”  Several students nod in agreement; the discomfort in talking about what is happening in the moment is always present and is often articulated as a criticism of the value of “just sitting around and talking” because the students generally prefer to passively sit and listen to a pontificating professor,  occasionally asking piercing questions like “Will this be on the midterm?” 

 

Jerry is very comfortable with the resistance and remains quiet, letting others deal with the question.  Suzy, an aspiring psychologist, says to George:  “Sounds like you’re angry about something.  Did you have a bad weekend?”  George responds: “Why you always trying to analyze what I’m saying?  I said what I meant; I don’t see why I have to tell you or anybody else about my weekend or how I’m feeling.  All this looking at your navel and talking about what I “really” mean is a bunch of s**t.  I came to school to learn something that would help me make a living.  Not to spend my time talkin’ about talkin’ about.” 

 

Mel, a white, suited, aspiring CPA, says “George has a point, Suzy.  What are we getting out of sitting in this circle talking about what just happened here?  I pay a lot of money to take these classes and I fail to see how what goes on here is going to help me be a successful accountant.”  Many of the other students are now nodding their heads while some of the others, who have a history of being defenders of Jerry’s class, stare down at the floor.  Jerry enters the fray by asking: ”What is happening in the group right now?”  Anne, a housewife who has recently returned to college to get her degree after her children have left the nest, says:  “We are dividing up into factions around whether we support or rebel against the authority.  And we are exploring the boundaries of how far we can go in resisting the authority.”  Jerry thinks to himself: “Here’s somebody who has actually done the reading.  Let’s see if they kill her for it.” 

 

And they do.  George comes after Anne, accusing her of being a “brownnoser,” who is playing up to Jerry to get a good grade.  Mel joins the attack, suggesting Anne has been able to live off her husband and has never had to make a living herself.  Suzy comes back with a crack about alpha male bonding and George and Mel’s need to assert their power by joining against a woman, Anne, and the authority figure, Jerry.  And so it goes, with the class ending on an upbeat note as Jerry congratulates them for their engagement and participation in the group and their ability to “get on the balcony” and analyze themselves using the perspectives of the authors they were assigned to read.  Jerry also hopes to illustrate that, no matter how negative their attacks on his classroom were, his praise still is important to them as the designated leader of the group.  Whether or not this is the case will be a matter for discussion at their next meeting.

 

Jerry continues his day, splitting his time between preparing and conducting his second class of the day and working on the paper he hopes to submit to the Journal of Applied Social Psychology.  He sees a number of students during his office hours, each of whom treat him with the prescribed deference due to a college professor; Jerry attempts to break through this deferential stance but he fails to really create a level playing field since the students know that no matter what he says, their future lies in his hands. 

 

On his way home, Jerry stops at the grocery store to pick up the meat and cheese that Shirley asked him to bring home for their dinner tonight.  Jerry loves to shop at this grocery; they specialize in artisanal breads and cheeses, organic produce, grass-fed beef and chickens that have led a comfortable, healthy life prior to being slaughtered (in the most empathic and benevolent way possible).  Jerry can never escape from this store having spent less than $50.00, no matter what he came in for and today is no exception.  He cheerfully carries the two paper bags full of groceries up the four flights of stairs to his second story apartment, looking forward to removing his shoes and settling down into a relaxing evening.

 

Unfortunately, however, relaxation is not to be had on this day.  Fred comes bursting into the living room crying and bleeding from his forehead.  Jerry jumps out of his chair and attempts to hold Fred,  who wriggles away from him and continues to sob while repeating over and over again “I didn’t mean to do it,” “I didn’t mean to do it.”   Jerry says “Do what?”  Fred shakes his head and continues his refrain.  Jerry grabs Fred’s arms and holds him still, looks him in the eye and says, “Do what?”  Fred responds in spasms “I broke,” “Nicky Lopano’s arm,” “because he dissed,” “mom.”  Jerry asks, “What do you mean, he dissed mom?  And how did you break his arm?”  Fred responds, calming down a little, “He said mom was a bitchy kike, so I grabbed his arm and pulled it behind his back and told him to take it back.”  “And?” said Fred.  “He refused so I pushed his arm higher and it cracked.  I let go and it just hung there, looking weird.”   “And what happened next?”  “He screamed and threw a rock at me that hit me in the head, then ran away.” 

 

Jerry tries to comfort Fred while trying to maintain some objectivity about what has happened and how he feels about it.  He understands that Fred was standing up for Shirley and lost control in his rage; he also understands that a boy now has a broken arm that will create a confrontation between the Lopanos and the Abramovs. He does not want to mindlessly side with his son; he does not know the whole story �" what came before Nicky’s momma slur that provoked it?  On the other hand, he feels a strong need to be loyal to his son in this difficult moment and support him for his efforts to defend his mother’s reputation.  And the kike slur is an attack on his whole family and on Jews in general. 

 

Fred’s breathing has slowed down and he is able to talk normally.  “What is going to happen to me?  I didn’t mean to break his arm, only to get him to take back what he said.”  At this moment, Shirley, who has been out shopping for supplies for her business, enters the apartment and says, “What’s going on here?  What happened to your head, Fred?”   Fred responds by repeating his story to Shirley.  Shirley immediately takes his side, being particularly sensitive to the anti-Semitism of the kike remark.  Jerry intervenes to attempt to maintain a more neutral stance, saying “Wait, Shirley, we do not know anything about what precipitated Nicky’s saying what he did.  We need to understand both sides of this story before we take any sides.”  Shirley is not having Jerry’s objectivity and responds, “I don’t care what happened before this; nothing will justify this kind of remark.”  She stamps out of the room into the bedroom and slams the door behind her, mumbling something about over-educated stupidity. 

 

Jerry is now in a quandary.  The last thing he wants to happen is to abandon Fred and threaten their attachment.  On the other hand, he also wants to maintain a neutral stance and try to understand how this conflict unfolded and what led Nicky to attack Fred by insulting Shirley.  He would love to have Shirley’s heartfelt emotional response to this situation rather than his objective analytical posture; after all, his son is terrified and his wife and his tribe have been vilified.  But he is incapable of maintaining an authentic self-righteous response; he knows that Nicky is parroting kike from some adult he has overheard and he knows that his son has done something to evoke Nicky’s response.  In his role of group facilitator he would systematically explore all of this, seeking to learn what hurt Nicky and what Nicky was trying to do by attacking Fred and, indirectly, Shirley.   But such exploration is not possible when loyalty to family and broken bones are on the line. 

 

So Jerry does the next best thing; he tells Fred not to worry, that he will speak to Nicky’s parents and try to work out an arrangement with them that will meet both their and Fred’s concerns.  He warns Fred that he may have to apologize to Nicky for hurting him but that he will also ask that Nicky apologize for what he said about Shirley.  Fred is not noticeably relieved by Fred’s assurances but Jerry feels confident that he can workout a reconciliation that will restore peace to the neighborhood and, perhaps more importantly, affirm his status in his family as a principled and caring father and spouse.

 

Jerry walks up to the fifth floor apartment that houses the Lopano brood, all seven of them.  Jerry has had little to do with the Lopanos, saying “Hi” when they pass in the apartment courtyard and occasionally entertaining Nicky when Fred brings him to visit.  He knows that Nicky’s father, Anthony, works in construction and that they attend St. Mary’s, the local Catholic church.  He wonders, as he climbs the stairs, whether Nicky learned about kikes at church or whether it is more of a family figure of speech.  He knows that some of the Catholic school kids have attacked Fred in the past, calling him a “Christ killer,” and a “dirty Jew.”  He does not know where the Lopanos stand on these matters and is hesitant about raising the issue, although it was the precipitating incident that ended in Nicky’s broken arm.  Jerry decides to play it be ear, adapting his approach to the stance taken by Nicky’s parents.

 

As he knocks on the Lopano’s door, Jerry takes a deep breath and prepares for the worst.  Anna Lopano, Nicky’s mother, opens the door looking flustered and very upset.  She stares at Jerry and then shrieks at him that his son is a monster who has intentionally broken her son’s arm and required him to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance.  She tells Jerry that he will have to pay for all the costs associated with the injury and that she will not allow Nicky to associate with Fred in the future. 

 

Jerry maintains his calm and asks Anna whether Nicky told her how he came to be injured.  Anna says that Nicky told her that he had an argument with Fred and that Fred just jumped on him and twisted his arm until it broke.  Jerry asks whether Nicky said anything about what the argument was about or what he had said that provoked Fred to jump on him.  Anna says that nothing Nicky could have said would justify breaking his arm.  Jerry agrees that the injury cannot be justified but that Anna should know what Nicky said that provoked Fred.  He then tells her about the kike remark aimed at Shirley. 

 

Anna is taken aback and says that she does not believe that Nicky would say such a thing.  Jerry suggests that she ask Nicky if he said it.  He also says that he has told Fred that he would have to apologize for hurting Nicky and that he would also expect Nicky to apologize for what he said about Shirley.  Anna replies that she will speak to Nicky about what he said and that if he did insult Shirley that he would have to apologize for it.  But, she says a bit petulantly, you will still have to pay for the costs of the injury.  Jerry says that he will pay half of the medical costs but that Nicky bears some of the responsibility for what occurred and should have to bear the costs of his words.  Jerry also says that Nicky and Fred have a strong friendship and that he would not like to see it end because they both lost their tempers over an unfortunate disagreement.  Anna says that she will think about whether this is possible, especially since her husband is not likely to accept any reconciliation until he has some time to calm down.  Jerry accepts that this is as far as they can get and says he is sorry that all this has happened and hopes that they can find a way to straighten things out that will allow for the kids to be friends and for the families not to have hard feelings between them. 

 

Jerry leaves the Lopano abode feeling pretty good about how he has handled this incident.  He returns home to tell Shirley about his diplomatic success.  Her response stuns him; she calls him an embarrassment to his race, the worst kind of appeaser, a eunuch with no balls to stand up to the goyim who have been victimizing Jews since the Romans crucified Christ.   That her son has the courage to stand up to anti-Semitic vilification, only to be undermined by a father who negates his courageous act with simpering compromises. 

 

Jerry’s short-lived feeling of accomplishment evaporates in the steam of Shirley’s contempt; he wonders, not for the first time, whether peace can ever satisfy the human condition.

Author's Note

All comments will be very much appreciated

Reviews

[keatsgb]

Hello Barry, you certainly have a distinct style and can narrate the ordinary in a compelling way. A thoroughly enjoyable story!