The war within....

There's a war waging within me

that threatens to devour my whole...

Lead to a drastic transformation

or just leave me with this soul...

It's a battle between the furious two...

One is who I was

and the other my alter ego...

Just the somebody I am

versus what I might change into...

The outcome decides my fate, my future

and just what I'm gonna be...

The selfless, loving heart that I was

or an evil, dark, gruesome creature!!!

It's the battle between my heart and mind...

and my patience is being tortured!!!

It's ego pitted against love once more...

The trecherous war, truly one of a kind!!!

 

It's a war waging within me

threatening to devour my whole!!!!

Author's Note

ehh....

Reviews

[Kena Dawn Augustine]

great job! i know i have written MANY poems like this. about the battle between good and evil. this "war" in side of yoursleves. read "detainee." so I had background knowledge before reading this wonderfully penned piece. I like your style, it appeals to me. however, maybe too many uses of the exclamation mark? i usually don't even use it at all. but overall, amazing. truly.

[Fredrick Malkyor]

This poem is to my taste. A man with a split personality, like myself, can feel every word that is flowing through this poem. I can feel the pain and suffering of the man with in the lines for I have just gone through a painful break up just recently. With hopes of more well written pieces,
Fredrick Malkyor (the modern day Dorian Gray)

[SamBug]

Very good. I personally liked it.

[LisetteCanWrite!]

The heart and mind... truly are one of a kind.. though we can wage battles of beliefs and desires.. needs and greeds.. daily paths are not always easy to map out for so many situations in life. I love the depth of this battle that wages on within you.. how you paint a portrait of emotions that stirs the reader to want to assist you (but knowing they can't).. I hope the loving creature can learn to embrace the beast and live in harmony together.. it's not always easy.. as we are all sinners and saints on some level.. try to just do your best with what you got and know.. is what I have always been told! Too many lines here to pick favorites.. known this battle a few times in my life.. I am not sure the intensity is the same.. but we all feel this sometimes. It's like the battle between spirituality and atheism.. it surrounds so many today! Pick love and peace not war!

[funeralmoon]

nice.. it seems we all have a darker side one that threatens all the good in us..
my advice give in a little its fun to be bad.. :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

The battle of heart and mind has been an Armageddon from the beginning, one going on logic the other on feelings... a great job in expressing the neverending war from within.

[Xfaerie corpseX]

This is very deep, and in fact relates to me at certian points in time. Kudos

[*** Hey Jude***]

Youu have painted a picture with words and I am immersed in this captivating write. I can relate so very much to this write from experiences in my life as the last stanza holds so much truth for me as I contemplate...ice write as you see the future is what we make of it. I enjoyed the whole piece, but the last two lines were poignant. ~ Jude :-)

[Stephanie]

It seems to me that you started out with a rhyme scheme but as you went along, the feelings took over and the words just wrote themselves. Battles between who we were, are and will be are super damaging in my opinion... We try to rework ourselves when there's really only minor tweaks necessary. I could feel the frustration as the poem went on, something I've been through myself, as many have. Another great piece!

[Fran Marie]

It's the battle between my heart and mind...


and my patience is being tortured!!!


It's ego pitted against love once more...


The trecherous war, truly one of a kind!!!


This i s so true the war rages within one when heart and mind are not

in harmony~ the mind says one thing and the heart feels another ~very confusing

to the soul~ Great PeN!

[Julia]

Ooo nice and emotional yet creative piece that other people can relate to. i like it. its like a fight between ones self ying and yang AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!