My bleeding heart...

All i am left with after writing this one...are tears, surging pain and aches...feels as thou am watching my own wrists slit through...and bleeding all the way

"He walks towards the door...
bleeding his heart over the floor...
she stands behind watching...
not a single word out calling..."

 

Standing in the rain,
getting drenched to the core,
each drop feeds on my pain,
the wounds afresh and pure...

My eyes they swell with tears,
the heart aches and longs for you,
haunting me were all my fears,
they won over me and came true...

You slammed the door of your heart,
leaving me all alone shattered,
in a fraction of a second, you just tore me apart,
with just thoughts in my mind and unanswered questions scattered...

You say I've changed...

I was never perfect,
but I tried hard to be...

I opened my heart to none,
but with you even that begun...

I was never the kind you wanted...
but now that i am...
you still got me haunted...

 

"numbness still brims over my soul...
blood feels ice cold...
am turning blue...
freezing with the loss of you..."

Reviews

[Fredrick Malkyor]

Dear Barricade,

I can feel the deep depression that is flowing out of the character like a waterfall of pain. No one is perfect, so why does everone try to be. Those who think that they are perfect is only seeing a mirage of their reflected selves. The only thing you can do is to just be your self in this matter.

Your Friend,

Fredrick Malkyor

[Em North]

wow.. its beautiful in a slightly depressing way.. i like it. it creates this image of being torn away from all that you care about and being left with the reflections of your past and how close you came to having all you wanted... being so much more with that one person... it really hits home when you start to think of stuff like that and realize how similar that is to stories you hear of people or that some people have themselves.

You say I've changed...

I was never perfect,
but i tried hard to be...

I opened my heart to none,
but with you even that begun...

I was never the kind you wanted...
but now that i am...
you still got me haunted...


in this part of the poem it shows the type of confusion and the pain and effort you'd put into the relationship and how it was never enough...
...i really like this.. it really hits home.. thanks for sharing it

[Erotic Goddess]

"numbness still brims over my soul...
blood feels ice cold...
am turning blue...
freezing with the loss of you..."

The emotion in this are just so amazingly vivid. You did a great job in writing this, in making us see what you wanted us to see.

xxoxx

[Shadow of Sunshine]

Thats...REALLY good, it's beautiful in a depressing way, i really liked it!!

[samantha]

thats such a good poem hun keep up the good work

[♡Moon Child♡..]

Keep at it Vin. Do what will make you happy, dear.

[sisyqueen2008]

I love it! I really like the meaning to it and i thought it had a great flow. Keep up the great work! :)

[Sinny]

How sad.

This expressed the thought of a loved on betraying you and leaving you in the dirt.....not even bothering to help you or lift a finger.

So depressing barricade-san.....

[xXotaku-girlXx]

wow, that's really depressing... it evokes a lot of raw emotion, and I liked reading it alot^^

[17thWhitePrince]

WoW
So Sad
Feels As If There Is Nothing You Can Do To Get Back What Was Lost
Must Feel Like Hell
Like An Eternal Boulder That Seems To Be On Top Of You Never To Be Moved
Oh How It Must Hurt
How It Must Sting
What A Horrible
Aweful
Tragic Scene Indeed

May There Be A Way To Bring Her Back
To Save Her
To Keep Her
To Hold Onto Her Forever
What Pain It Must Be To Lose Someone

"It is always raining
Constantly
It never ends
As if the sun itself has ceased to exist again

"And oh
What pain lies buried deep inside of me
That screams out such anguish
Such everlasting agony

"If only somehow
Someway
This pain would end
Never to reveal its ugly head again"

- the first three stanzas from a poem I am working on ... "Tragedy of a Lost Love" -

May You Find A Way
May You Never Give Up
Never

[Gheeneil]

I like the Line : each drop feeds on my pain. It's loaded with vivid and strong imagery relative to one's agony of losing a beloved. This piece is packed with so much emotion.