why again

Why cant I fight the urges to cut? I wake up in the morning and thats the first thing I think of.. I feel helpless and overpowered.. I crave the feeling that I get when I get to cut.. So many scares on my wounded soul.. I want to stop but with no way of getting help or helping myself. I feel lost and I know that somehow eventually I want to stop , but knowing and doing are totally diffrent.. why do we think that the more broken we are the better we can become??? if cutting were heaven I would be at peace with me , you , and all the ones who matter...

Reviews

[Gonce]

Hmmm. Well, having been a cutter, and I can safely say I have not cut myself in a year, I can find some sort of sympathy towards your situation. All you have to realize is that things will get better. I know, that sounds corny and stupid as hell. Things will go good, then s**t, then good, then s**t. That is life. We all have to realize it, and find ways to cope. I have heard the exact same speech from acid users, pot users, alcoholics, smokers(mainly I do that last one currently...). You are not the only person, so it is not like you are some evil person for doing so. We all have some sort of way to escape. I'm not saying it is fine to cut yourself, but, well, we all have to find some way to hold our heads high and keep truckin' through life. Things aren't as bad as they seem(i have to tell myself this as well, not trying to be a hypocrite here). Things will get better, chin up kid.