S**t Bums in Taco Bell

I was actually just sitting in taco bell...

there are s**t bums everywhere

in taco bell today. i waited

five minutes in line because a woman

in a red budweiser shirt, and stained blue jean

shorts cut off around her road map thighs

was angry over her order.

she said, I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WAIT THIS LONG

GODDAMMIT. 

and then she whispered to her s**t bum husband and

sister, but her whisper was borderline

shouting, SERIOUSLY. HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO MAKE

A F*****G TACO?

her s**t bum husband sported a cardinals nation t-shirt, which

at the time, made me rather embarrassed to be 

a cardinals fan. he was wearing plaid pajama pants

that protruded with the girth of his fat and round

gut. his tattered sneakers told me that they were

begging him to exercise more, or they would go on strike.

the s**t bum woman sits down. WE'RE PRESSED FOR TIME. I GOTTA GO

TURN IN MY APPLICATION FOR FOOD STAMPS.

food stamps? but my lady you have taco bell for that.

i notice she has a tattoo on her arm of a bulldog, and her hair 

looks like a messy brown volcanic mountain, with blond roots

streaking toward the top of her ponytail.

my day is not getting better. i should have gone to 

burritoville, where the s**t bums there are more

recline and reclusive. they know that it's best for people to think

that they're s**t bums, instead of opening their mouths

and removing all doubt, as the saying goes. 

the double doors open and more s**t bums walk in. 

it's my lucky day.

and as i'm ordering, the s**t bum woman with the circus top

ponytail, is standing behind me.

she smells of cigarettes, and a strong scent that rivals the 

mucky banks of the mississippi delta, when the sun is up

after a thunderstorm passed through.

I WONDER IF THEY'RE TAKING APPLICATIONS? she says.

i debate on walking out on my food, leaving it there for

the s**t bums to feast upon it. i'm sure i would find favor

in God's eyes if i did that. 

Reviews

[Alexander Emberson]

The most striking thing about this entire thing for me wasn't just the use of, "S**t bums," but the final stanza. The image of them "feasting" on your food has me cringing and going, "YES! I TOTALLY SEE THAT S**T!"

[c.m.]

I loved this. Working in fast food, I understand "those customers". Beautifully written.