I Can Remember How Great You Are- The Next Day

*******

 

why

can't

 

i have that time agian?

when it was all just

so

amazing.

and comfortable.

 

back when it didn't matter

nothing mattered.

destiny

didn't.

 

back when

you could show up

at any time

of the day.

 

back when

i thought you died,

that day,

when i was crying because destiny was still in love with you,

and i knew i didn't compare to her.

back when

i had to tell katie you and oscar were boy scouts,

because her and i were home alone,

and we weren't allowed to go outside when the parents weren't home.

so there

was a knock.

at my door.

 

i looked

out the window,

and it was black as night, (because it was)

so it looked like nobody was there.

so i thought it was just the dog knocking her tail against floor.

 

but,

just to be sure,

i opened the door.

and

there you were.

 

'hey'

was what you said,

i do believe.

 

i jumped about a foot.

and screamed, too,

i think.

 

katie slowly tore away from the computer screen and asked who was at the door.

because i was shaky from the scare,

and because you were there,

i mumbled some lie about boy scouts and

told her i'd take care of it.

 

once outside,

i was freezing and barefoot.

my teeth were chattering,

which they had never done before,

and i was laughing all high-pitched,

to where it sounded like a hiccup.

 

and you held me in your arms,

i told you i loved you.

 

and oscar stood,

stamping out the cold.

 

we turned to playing basketball,

which,

between you two boys,

turned into a wrestling match.

 

you asked me if you could pick me up,

and i told you i was way too fat for that.

you just laughed and went back to wrestling.

argued that if you could pick up oscar,

you could pick up me.

but,

whatever,

you went back to messing around.

 

and you and him did that for that a while.

until oscar was like, "look bre! i'm gonna flip him!"

and,

then,

like a guitarist at a rock concert, he slammed you into the ground.

your head hit the stump of our dead tree with a 'thump'

loud enough that i heard it on the porch.

 

the ground itself was also frozen.

 

i ran to your side.

shouting your name.

baby, please say something.

 

no response.

only a cold body that smelled like your cologne.

 

oscar and i going insane.

me, running inside,

only to run back out, screaming if i should call 911? i told my sister you were boyscouts! she wants to know what's going on! what do i do?

 

you were still silent.

and i was so scared.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

screaming your name.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

i thought you died.

 

 

but, you groaned.

and tears sprung to my eyes.

 

and your first words after coming back?

 

'i love you.'

 

you asked me to lie down on you,

but i wouldn't do that after you just got knocked out,

so i lied down next to you.

held your hand as tears sprung to my eyes.

 

"i thought you were gone," i said

 

but you just laughed.

 

it wasn't long before you guys had to leave.

my parents were due home any second.

 

if i could, i would relive that day so many times.

you were an excellent boyfriend.