You're self deprication reminds me of me :). I don't know why writers have come to think that short is synonomous with bad when it's just the opposite: an overly wordy writer tends to be a bad one and writers who gets across there point eloquently and CONCISELY tend to be the better ones. With this short, sweet piece you managed to get across the conflicting feelings of loving someone yet feeling pain bc you know you can never have them. It I felt bad for the subject of the poem and when you can evoke emotion in your readers you know you've succeeded
Those wide open dreams do happen. I could tell you stories where I decided friendship was good enough and things felled into place. A short poem with hope and fear as the message. A very good poem.
Coyote
Short, with meaning. Driven by hurt, compelled by the waves crashing in of heart song melodious hope even when depressed. Maybe there isn't a chance for the two of you in particular, but there's always another door opening for someone else.
It's not awful, it's inspiring and beautiful. I feel the emotion within this, as one hopes to love another, but there is always a barrier between the two lovers. So romantic and sad. Great job!
Welcome to my world!
So, as you see my name is Naomi Rose. Other people may know me as Naomi the lost the ninja. Or just as plain old Naomi XP.
I am fifteen years young (bahaha).
I write poems a .. more..