Where is our Helping Hand?

Written on a whim for ABC Creativity Contest.

An angry army arrives

By brook, burning broken bridges, bashing, brewing
Candidly chanting cult chorus, counting corpses
Defeating, destroying, demolishing, devilish demise
Everyone's era ending, evil erupting
Following foreign footsteps, faking fierceness
Gathering goods, galloping giants grin
Haunt, hunt, hurting History
Ignore Intelligence, Ignorantly Implore
Jews, just Jews, Jealousy
Killing kind kikes*
Looting lands, liquidating, leaving ladies languishing
Men murdered, midnight mourning, mysteries mistaken
No nourshing net, no, no nation noticed
Overwhelming obstacles oliberate our opportunites
Powerlessly proverty prevails, Protection prohibited
Quams quietly quake, quickly
Reminisce rightful return, regaining reighteousness
Scornful scoffs scorch sunburnt scars
Tears transcend tyrants' taunts
Universal understanding underminding, unnecessary
Vexed, viciously violated victims
Why, Why, World will we whisper wants whismically
Xavier, Xenophanes, we are x-communicated
Yearn for your young, your youth
Zestfully drink from your zegedine** zibib***
 

 

Author's Note

* a Jewish word for poor Jews
**A drinking cup
***Alcholic drink made from raisins

~
I messed up the flow of words at the end, hopefully I am not disqualified

Reviews

[deadlife]

Kudos!
It's a WOW write! Simply WOW.
I want to scream.. (if you don't mind) it's brilliant.. Mind blowing...
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOWWW!
So skillfully penned.
As i read i was feeling the urgency...And how difficult it could be to write..but you just did it. I loved it.
Thanks for an awesome write.
Love.Laugh.Live
blessings. . .
~rupam

[Writer CW Kirkland]

Nicely written, and I am impressed by your ability to use the same letter to start each word in each line. Having said that, I was somewhat (mildly) disappointed that you had to stray from that pattern for the last three lines. I was more and more impressed as I read each line until the pattern suddenly changed at the end. Regardless, this was impressive writing overall!

[Constance]

Nah... nothing said you had to make EVERY word have that letter... :) Great job here, I like it! Fave lines:
"Vexed, viciously violated victims
Why, Why, World will we whisper wants whismically
Xavier, Xenophanes, we are x-communicated
Yearn for your young, your youth
Zestfully drink from your zegedine** zibib***"
These lines told one helluva story!!
As did the whole thing... and a fun exercise, wasn't it?
Nice use of vocab, too. :)

[Prose-full]

wow great acrostic..very, very powerful ..

[Jonathan Bryant Dean]

I feel that your flow was improved upon at the end. The detour from strict alliteration was actually a relief, as far as the ease of reading.

[Charles D. Moorer]

You are incredibly talented! No need to apologize an editor will help you. Your alphabet is right on! You should be published. You have a great talent that needs to be shared. Excellent write!!!!

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This was beautifully done. So difficult in the x's and z's...I've done this before but not for a contest, just a writing exercise. I'd vote for it! :o)

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Very creative and the flow is smooth. Good luck with your contest.

[Lyrical Love]

Excellent write. Great passion.
Awakening!-thanks, Lyrical