Always and Forever

I was just a kid when I lost you,
I didn't quite understand it...
But you were crying,
So I was crying too.

I don't remember a lot about you,
I remember just a few things.
You always made me smile,
You made 'daddy' seem less bad...

Im the same age you were that day,
Sixteen and finally understanding the world.
Yet everything seems so bad...
Why can you make it go away? (like you used to.)

Its been more than a decade,
Yet the pain mever goes away.
...I don't even know if you're alive...
Please be alive.

I keep hoping you've got a new family,
Married and with a baby.
I keep hoping its better than what I got,
Because I stil cry a lot.

You were my hero,
I don't know if you knew that.
It doesn't matter that we're not blood related,
At least, that's what I think.

You're my big brother,
The one I admire with my whole heart.
My only brother,
Do you still love me?

I think about you every day.
You're the only onr I miss,
And I've lots a lot of people...
Nobody ever stays...

Would you have stayed?
If 'daddy' hadn't made you leave?
Would you have kept Her from burning me?
And kept mommy from going to jail?

Would you have protected me?
I miss you so much Larry....
Mom gets irritated every time I mention you...
They say you didn't love me.

You're the only person I've ever trusted...
The only person I've really loved,
My big brother...
But you've probably forgotten me.

If you ever by chance find my poetry,
I hope you realize what you mean to me,
Because I miss you so much.
Always and forever,

Your baby sister, Ree.