Coalesce

His muscular hand- 

Her dainty hand

coalesce together 

like the molecular clouds 

fleeing the empty haze.

   -a.t 

Author's Note

This is just a random thought I had. Any suggestions to improve?

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Very nice use of words. Made the reader feel and understand the words. Thank you Amanda for sharing the amazing poetry. No wasted words.
Coyote

[Phill Oz O'fee]

The duality of the gender intermingling through the tenderness of touch comes across very strongly; in just a few creative words - excellent piece ... :-)

[Crowley]

I love the juxtaposition of size with men and women, Always feeling like a huge awkward buffoon, but knowing that some women like that at least a little. this is romantic and heady with an amazing feel. I must be careful not to crush it in my palm...that would be a shame. Loved it!

[Amanda Trerotola]

Same! It is cute. Thank you for reading!

[Onlyme]

Wonderful image held within these words. Of romance, passion and closeness.

[Amanda Trerotola]

Thank you so much!

[Ghost writer]

That's pretty cute, I like it

[Amanda Trerotola]

Thank you!

[emipoemi]

In truth, most short poems feel so fleeting, and there's not much time to actually allow them to sink in before they're done....unless there's a purpose to their brevity (like a structural device brilliantly executed), the readers would tend to come out of it with an anticlimactic sensation. BUT, the last couple of lines of your poem are killer. The only thing I really need to say is that I think you're in want to say "molecular" (not "monecular").

[Amanda Trerotola]

Thank you so much! I agree short poems can feel emotionless at times depending on the writer. I am going to fix that one mistake!

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.

[Amanda Trerotola]

Do you think "Like the molecular clouds, Fleeing the empty haze" is better than what I corrected it to?

[emipoemi]

the lines without the definite articles merely gain a different meaning. The choice is in the end your own. What do you want to convey in this image? The definite articles normally have more power, but it's your call in the end. How do you feel when you read those lines aloud?

[Amanda Trerotola]

I agree it is all in what feels best. Honestly, what I had first in those two last lines spoke to me. I changed it back. :)

[emipoemi]

Glad I could be of service :)