And More

And More

A Poem by Amanda Trerotola

Y0u took my kindness for granted
And spilled my heart on the floor
I forgave you once, 
Twice
Three times
And more. 

You are charming on the outside
Chuckles that capture the soul 
Within seconds we were friends
You became in control.

You acted like nothing happened
Hooked me in with your lies
The truth unveiled 
Where I saw your disguise.

Your veil turned black,
You did me wrong
And yet you say, "What did I do?"
You still strang me along. 

I slashed your manipulator soul 
From my life and heart
You did no wrong through your eyes
And because of you, our friendship fell apart. 

-Sometimes people don't deserve this many chances. 

© 2018 Amanda Trerotola


Author's Note

Amanda Trerotola
I am not sure where to go with this. Any help, suggestions, and or thoughts would be appreciated!

My Review

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Reviews

I love the theme and message. I think that as you move forward with this piece, that you should maybe have a bit more detail.

Posted 6 Years Ago


I like the theme, and the message. The musicality is a bit iffy towards the end, but I quite enjoyed it. You could definitely consider expanding this, for such a theme requires at least a bit more to do it justice. Fiddle around with it, you can definitely make a more precious gem out of this. You simply need to feel, and allow those feelings to guide you. Then you'll know where to go with this. Great start!

Posted 6 Years Ago


emipoemi

6 Years Ago

Muuuuuuch Muuuuuuch better!! I would only suggest tweaks in two places:

- "I forgave .. read more
Amanda Trerotola

6 Years Ago

You’re incredible! Thank you so much for the help.
emipoemi

6 Years Ago

always a pleasure.
Well this one I can relate to. Ironically, as a guy I was the one who gave chances, uncountable chances. Funny right? haha Don't know where yours apply though or this is true to life. But I'll tell you this; you gave him/her/it more than enough chances to redeem one's self and I think that's beautiful and you have a very big heart for doing so. This is a very deep writing (and I like it), your emotions are there and you expressed it well. But in any case, what he/she/it did is not suitable for you and it's not worth it to just keep giving chances. You deserve better and statistically, you deserve more than what you have put in. For me, Let go and Keep your head up! ^_^

Posted 6 Years Ago


Amanda Trerotola

6 Years Ago

I appreciate everything you said. Thank you for reading!

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259 Views
3 Reviews
Added on July 14, 2018
Last Updated on July 18, 2018
Tags: poetry, dark, story, friends, forgiveness, journey

Author

Amanda Trerotola
Amanda Trerotola

About
Welcome to my page, my name is Amanda. I always had a joy for writing, but stopped for many years until I stumbled across my old poems. Figured, I would start writing again. My dream is to write a.. more..

Writing