le cygne

you can hurt me all you want but, 

after, will you treat me, treat me really nicely?

tied up the swan with silk ribbons, 

wrapped around her throat tightly. 

torture me, torture me nicely,

i’ll smile and they’ll like it

with you i become who i am, 

i take all you give me and 

i become who i am. 

white ribbons tied around my wrists, 

red and purple on my skin

i transform under your palm, 

mangled wings, my swan. 

steeled heart, steel swords, 

among other things, mon cygne.

late at night, i observe

a door hanging by the hinges and

painted clouds in the skylight, 

i need you like a host needs a parasite. 

treat me really nicely, 

pink champagne and ice cream. 

my white swan bows her head in captivity, 

roses i drowned in a jar full of water,

you can hurt me but don’t hate me

sketches for my familiar drunk daydream,
with no audience i still dance ballet

i spin around nine times, dante,

they see i’m not really me, don’t they?

i want to leave and i want to stay 

right here in the crucible

i don’t want to say goodbye but

i don’t hope for anything

when something is so cold, it burns,

block of ice, you hurt under my fingertips,

i’m always too warm, feverish 

there is a cost, there is a cost for

everything you do, there is a price

you can’t grow anything without weeds,
maybe my nature is my vice,

maybe you weren’t paying attention

i can love without you being worthy,

you can hate me, but don’t hurt me.

Author's Note

this is still a bit of a work in progress that i've been tweaking over the past two days. any feedback is helpful and much appreciated!

Reviews

[nadia dmitri]

Wow another amazing piece! This feeling may sound odd to those who haven't experienced it but, as you put it, pain like this can feel poetic; beautifully destructive. It is magnetic and circular. You have done an amazing job capturing such meddled emotions, it is very inspiring :)

[AYVID N]

I loved your treatment of Dante's Hell. You paint a rich and compelling picture in the poem. This relationship felt so sad and hurtful and I sensed a dependency in it. The imagery of ribbons is poignant and I just wanted to give the sufferer a very comforting hug.

[jaye river]

thank you for your kind words and thoughts divya. i'm glad you enjoyed :)

[emmajoygreen]

Seems you are playing both game with self and game VIA another. Part choice part gifts of anything going but -the value of that seems unimportant to you.. Is that enough and for how long, dear jaye?. Your wording lies heavy and yet visual.. you write so intensely and finely, is as if you let the meaning write itself. Incrediblly raw yet .. more to come, perhaps.

[jaye river]

thank you for your review emma, i always enjoy reading your thoughts

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the repetition of the ribbons...very effective.
Love can't grow without some weeds, but if they just choke and never allow us to see beauty, is it worth trying to find love there?
I like the paradox, "torture me nicely."
A real battle within self going on here.
j.

[jaye river]

thank you for your insight jacob!
yeah, i tried to capture the internal struggle that comes with difficult relationships. i'm glad it shows