The vessel of the charred soul

Vessel of the charred soul

The erroneous caresses of the churlish wind

The burning coal and the abject blizzard

The darkness and the sun

I could feel neither of them

Nor the living scars of the dead past

Nor the scarlet streams of this broken heart.

 

I’m prowling towards the dead life

To resurrect her and subside her strife

Yet the steps halt themselves so suddenly

While these mauled arms stretched for it, praying madly .

 

What was I? What has become of me?

Am I still lifelessly alive, drowning in the oblivious sea?

Or am I just a wretched vessel,

With a charred soul residing in there?

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Pax]

What was I? What has become of me?
Am I still lifelessly alive, drowning in the oblivious sea?
Or am I just a wretched vessel,
With a charred soul residing in there?

~ I am asking the same question to myself over and over. As I drown, I learned how to swim. As I become wretched, I came to be hopeful. I am thinking I have changed a lot through the years asking what has become of me? Yet I still feel the same me as I always am. More often life overflows us with too many unnecessary burdens, we tend to forget what’s more important in life. I believed to be better hopeful than not to have hope at all. To love oneself first, to be who we want to be, to be free, wanting to belong to a place we are wanted & loved – but for now, I am too blind to see the little things that are great and more than enough to keep me satisfied. Someday my friend, my soul will soar high to be content, I know you will be too… keep penning.

[The dark story]

Yes it sometimes like this to me. I always feel a strong urge to change myself but into what exactly i really dont know. I am not expopsive about myself. I am pretentious among my freind and family…i never show them my lost side and the one who is so pessimistic. That is why i love writing as it makes me pen my thought…the very me…even if peoplw dont like it or not.

Thank you so much for this kind review! It is always a pleasure to hear from you.thank you!!

[Pax]

I feel you my friend, I do that sometimes. We are the same, writing helps us to be free from our hearts to put it into words. describing the feeling... your most welcome, anytime my friend...

[prodicallife]

Dear Atiba,

What a beautiful write, I could relate it to one of my poetry The new moon.

I was well driven with the verse and it kept me captured until last. You were very much successful in making me feel the pain without even giving me a pinch of it.

Great write.

Stay blessed
Prodical

[InsanityWriter]

I absolutely love the imagery here. Great work!!

[Prritiy]

I’m prowling towards the dead life
To resurrect her and subside her strife
.
.

What was I? What has become of me?
Am I still lifelessly alive, drowning in the oblivious sea?
Or am I just a wretched vessel,
With a charred soul residing in there?

a tale of pain, searching for the identity amid disillusions, disappointments and negativity where there seems to be no light... but within still a hope maybe a ray of light.... this is all what is clearly seen in the composition. written very nicely, liked it.

Best Wishes

[The dark story]

nice interpretation. glad you liked it. thanks a lot

[Prritiy]

you are welcome :)

[Prritiy]

i know i might have seen what was not there as you wrote may be your wrote with some other feelings but this is what i saw, i would love to know what your feelings were :)

[The dark story]

actually its the same as what you have mentioned there:
"a tale of pain, searching for the identity amid disillusions, disappointments and negativity where there seems to be no light..."

i sometimes feels like this...like i don't belong here, my existence is just futile...and then i just ruminate over it...a lot..unless i find a satisfactory answer.
but going it takes a lot of time though...and in that much time,i get more regrets than satisfaction.

[Prritiy]

hugs to you.

[The dark story]

"Smiling"…thanks for the care. Have a happy weekend.

[Leona Cieri]

I really liked this Atiba! Beautiful language and use of words with an understandable concept~ It flows well and the rhyme was a nice touch; great work!

[The dark story]

Thanks you for buying time for it. Glad you liked it.

[Anand Sehgal]

What was I? What has become of me?
Am I still lifelessly alive, drowning in the oblivious sea?
Or am I just a wretched vessel,
With a charred soul residing in there?

deep pensive thoughts penned beautifully. good write

[The dark story]

Thanks you.

[ayosonolowo]

Nice writting, top draw, i really like it

[The dark story]

Thanks for the read.

[ayosonolowo]

You're welcome

[junaid altaf]

we are a vessel that is always filled with an emotion and thats life and when we feel empty thats not emptiness thats something as the mystery of nature............
and well about your poem
this is simply beautiful...................
loved it.............

[TL Boehm]

I’m prowling towards the dead life

To resurrect her

That is an intense line there. Well done.