Fast Forward

10/27/13

Fast forward to the days

when I pack up my suitcase.

I bring my dreams with me

as I take flight to his place.

Fast forward to the days

when he waits me with a grin.

I give him my timid smile,

with a kiss, he pulls me in.

Fast forward to the days

when we walk by the sea.

We voice out our hearts,

sweet lines of poetry.

Fast forward to the days

when he loves me and my scars.

I whisper, "I love you, too."

as we sleep beneath the stars.

Fast forward to the days

when he kneels with a ring.

And all throughout our marriage,

I hear the heaven sing.

Oh, love often contradicts

time's most usual pace

'Cause my thoughts always wander

fast forward to the days...

Author's Note

Some noticed that most of my poems depict sadness. So here's a ray of sunshine for you. :)

Reviews

[Douglas White]

Creative writing of all kinds exposes more about the writer than most of us would really care to admit. In your case with sad poems, the hurt and pain are clear. The circumstances that put you there are uniquely your own, and private, but the feelings that are left behind in your words are the things that people connect with. The emotions coming through are what separate "good" from "excellent". The best poems aren't necessarily about rhythm patterns, stanzas, word count, or anything else. The best poems are the ones you -feel-. That is what the great writers present and past are talking about when they are talking about "truthful writing".

This poem, for example, is a positive write - on the surface. But underneath, I can feel a sad wistfulness behind the words, a feeling that the sunshine is a little forced. A good poem about wishful thinking, but I don't think that you were entirely honest with yourself when you wrote it. Take a good long look at it, and I think you'll see what I mean.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the poem, along with pretty much everything else you've sent my way so far. But I honestly think that if you're sad, you should write sad, until you aren't sad anymore. Don't try to write sunshine when it really isn't in you, even if you think you're writing too many sad poems.

Try writing angry poems, though, if you want a change of pace. Those can be a bit fun. (And they often make great lyrics for death metal songs! Just saying...) :^D

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Doug, Doug, Doug... How come you are so good at things like this? You seem to know me more than I know myself!! Hahaha. Lots of insights that you've taught me today. :)

[Tom]

A wishful poem with a desired for happy outcome and I sincerely hope it all comes to pass !

Very nicely penned rhymed and versed!

[K. Hicks]

I love this its living for the future not for the past! great piece very sweet!

[Simon Welsh]

This is yesterday, hon. It's nice to walk about on the moon at least once though.

[Sioranth Smith]

This is so pretty! It really brought a smile to my face and I think it fosters a sense of hope of "good things come to those who wait," but of course we all want to rush forward into the amazing stuff out there. :) Really nice fluidity and very relaxing to read.

[annabellee]

Being able to fast forward would be nice...
my thoughts wander to the same place like yours sometimes.
Very relatable and sweet write :)

[Dr. Wood ?]

wonderful stuff, sort of a romantic reverse of my poem Tanners and Bobs...We always write bemoaning the past and this is, as you say, a ray of hope and sunshine...Great!

[Baban.A.A]

love is the essence in the whole poem, I believe the dreams are sweet we dream about whenever it happens or does not happen. we have to dream because without which we are stuck in a mass and barrel of reality. well done

[Mark]

dreams... expectations... they seem as if they are memories here, rather than dreams of what will be. Nicely done.

[icelandicblue]

A dream of a life to come. We fast forward to the milestones we wish for and why shouldn't we? They fill us with hope and joy. If you reach for happiness it is always easier to find. This is a lovely poem.