Fast Forward

10/27/13

Fast forward to the days

when I pack up my suitcase.

I bring my dreams with me

as I take flight to his place.

Fast forward to the days

when he waits me with a grin.

I give him my timid smile,

with a kiss, he pulls me in.

Fast forward to the days

when we walk by the sea.

We voice out our hearts,

sweet lines of poetry.

Fast forward to the days

when he loves me and my scars.

I whisper, "I love you, too."

as we sleep beneath the stars.

Fast forward to the days

when he kneels with a ring.

And all throughout our marriage,

I hear the heaven sing.

Oh, love often contradicts

time's most usual pace

'Cause my thoughts always wander

fast forward to the days...

Author's Note

Some noticed that most of my poems depict sadness. So here's a ray of sunshine for you. :)

Reviews

[Douglas White]

Creative writing of all kinds exposes more about the writer than most of us would really care to admit. In your case with sad poems, the hurt and pain are clear. The circumstances that put you there are uniquely your own, and private, but the feelings that are left behind in your words are the things that people connect with. The emotions coming through are what separate "good" from "excellent". The best poems aren't necessarily about rhythm patterns, stanzas, word count, or anything else. The best poems are the ones you -feel-. That is what the great writers present and past are talking about when they are talking about "truthful writing".

This poem, for example, is a positive write - on the surface. But underneath, I can feel a sad wistfulness behind the words, a feeling that the sunshine is a little forced. A good poem about wishful thinking, but I don't think that you were entirely honest with yourself when you wrote it. Take a good long look at it, and I think you'll see what I mean.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the poem, along with pretty much everything else you've sent my way so far. But I honestly think that if you're sad, you should write sad, until you aren't sad anymore. Don't try to write sunshine when it really isn't in you, even if you think you're writing too many sad poems.

Try writing angry poems, though, if you want a change of pace. Those can be a bit fun. (And they often make great lyrics for death metal songs! Just saying...) :^D

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Doug, Doug, Doug... How come you are so good at things like this? You seem to know me more than I know myself!! Hahaha. Lots of insights that you've taught me today. :)

[zaneybear]

I adore this, it's putting every girls dreams into words, always looking towards the future where it does get brighter. amazing! keep writing

[Calibaster]

This is a ray of sunshine! But just cause' you write so much sad stuff, doesn't mean you have to write happy stuff! :) You're great at both! Keep it up! ;)

[Sue]

aw such a sweet poem Blue :)

[lovergirl]

cheerful poem , i honestly loved it , hope these days come as fast as you wish , keep on girl good work :)

[ron]

This was a lovely poem Blue. I enjoyed it immensely.

[L4rn13]

I love the happiness and joy depicted within this poem but remember not always should happiness be felt because you are with someone. Still very nice thank you for sharing :)

[OTownPete]

Very possitive message combined with a gently and easy to follow flow.

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Thank you, Pete. :)

[kublakhan27]

One of the hardest things in the world to do is write upbeat literature, especially when it comes to poetry. I enjoyed the refreshing tone of optimism in this piece. It gives me reason to still believe in romance, with "still" being the key word there. Nicely done my friend :)

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

I think we are on the same boat... :) Thank you. :)

[kublakhan27]

My pleasure Blue :)

[Jack...]

This is beautiful and so filled with love and happiness my friend. You have brought wonderful words to our eyes this day. Nicely done.

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Thank you, Jack. I'm glad you felt that way. :)

[Mizo4]

sweet poem,
lovely and lyrical,
nice write,
:)

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Marion, thank you. :)