Ang Akon Utod/My Brother

How much he had changed...

Akon natyempuhan ang akon utod,

malinong nga gakatulog.

Tandaan ko pa ang tyempo sang una.

Ligad tatlo katuig, di gani lima...

Dungan kami gatulog kung hapon.

Kung galigo, ga-agaway pa sang  habon.

Daw pulbos gid ang amon hamot.

Patas pa kami nga inosente kag mabuot.

Indi gid kami mabulag kaangay sang duha ka tuko.

Baw! Daw ano ko gid kapalangga si toto!

Ginhimutadan ko pa ang iya hitsura...

Ang akon utod, indi ko na kilala.

---------English Translation---------

I chanced upon my brother,

sleeping peacefully.

I can still remember the old times.

Three years ago or maybe five.

We took afternoon naps together,

       fought over a soap during baths,

       smelled so much like powder.

We were both innocent and good.

Like two geckos, we were inseparable.

Oh! How I love my brother!

I scrutinized his face...

I don't know him anymore.

Author's Note

We had a poem-writing activity in our class and we had to write using our dialect (Hiligaynon). We did this for ten minutes. I have never been comfortable in my own dialect since I'm very much in love with English but I was surprised when I was having fun with Hiligaynon. :) However, I believe the beauty of the original version is incomparable to the English one. More often than not, a poem's power is lost when translated.)

I sent RRs for this because I'm proud of my dialect. :)

P.S. "Toto" is an endearment for a brother.

Reviews

[Rail G. Supra]

I was actually shocked at first because I didn't understand what was with the unfamiliar language until I continued. I had to re-read it several times for the full effect to sink in, each time coming down like another wave of realization. It's sad how things can change and this really touches me for that. Great work.

[Ankit Mahar]

Wow . It make me remember the ild times. How innocent we all are as a child .It made me think how much I have changed and as well as how the relation bw me and my sister have changed .

This is one of the few poems that reqlly reminds me of the past .
This is in true words a great great job .
Thank you very very much for sharing .
:-)

[Joyce S. Greene]

I can empathize with this one, Blue. Brothers and sisters and other close relatives can move away from each other as they age and yet the memories they share still bind them closely. It's really a tragedy but seems to be not uncommon. This is a very fine poem, even in the English translation.

[Mike Emil]

ARRGH!!!
can't read this
wait! yes I can
you are lucky
I didn't spill my drink

like the real poem
the one I can read
alright!

[annie lee]

We never seem to be as close when we grow older. Our lives branch onto different paths. Your poem is very poignant and lovely.

[MsJewel]

It is sad when two siblings are so close and as time goes on, they grow apart. Your poem is bittersweet and beautiful. I enjoyed this one very much!

:) Julie

[Donald]

It was very intense. You are right. It does lose something in the translation. So I just used the Translator in Google to look at the original text. It is still very good. I always enjoy your poems.

[Angel]

This is absolutely magnificent, Blue! I would never have guessed that English were not your native tongue. I am awed by people who can speak more than one language fluently. It is an amazing feat.
Such a bittersweet write...two sweet little children, so close...but then, sadly, they grow up. They change...and that closeness just isn't there any more. And oh, how we miss it!

I never knew that about "Toto"...I wonder if that's where Dorothy's little dog (Wizard of Oz) got his name...

[KAin]

Very nice. I wish I could understand Hiligaynon so I could really appreciate the value you hinted at. The last line is particularly sad, following such a heartwarming piece. A sad and beautiful piece, Blue.

[Dye]

How great to write a poem about your brother. The last two lines really show your view and how sadly people change over the years. Once thought to be inseparable and now maybe not so much. That's what I read from it anyway. I like the idea of having to write this in your dialect, I would imagine this would have lost translation if someone else translated it. Very nice Blue.