Colors of the wind

Trying abstract.

You try to create nature and you triumph,
You raise your hands and you're forgiven;
For every little deed when your fate becomes your faith,
It's your life towards which you're driven.


You tell me to imagine the finest picture of life,
Each time you teach me how to paint;
I try to create with the wild hue of the wind,
And with a swift of its gloss, sheer and quaint.


The color suddenly dissolves,
The tinge abruptly disappears;
Amongst the finest it stands blank and,
Plain without any smears.


You disperse the light and form seven wonders,
You need no compass for directions;
For none of your reality was your dream,
And none of your failures had objections.


You tell me to blend with life,
And to dream like never before;
To soar high like the firework,
To dance like water on the shore.


But life follows me wherever I take refuge,
It invites me to drink the potion of death,
And unravels my soul,
Before my last breath.


Why is that your philosophy is not understood?
Why is that I'm not given what I ask?
Why is that your life doesn't even lose to your death?
Why is that I can't paint with the colors of the wind?

Reviews

[David Benson]

*o my gosh*

"I try to create with the wild hue of the wind"

Can I stop here and tell you just how much I wish that I'd written that line?

"And with a swift of its gloss, sheer and quaint."

Your choice of words, phrasing and images is amazing. I feel it. I see it. Those choice take me into a mad whirl of ... well ... just everything!

I like the rhyme scheme that you've set up in this work. It is so unobtrusive that I didn't even notice it on first read. Only as I dug into the work did I notice the rhymes. They are clever and speak much to your talent.

I'm not a fan of ending poetry with questions, but yours speak to me. I do wonder at "Why is" as it doesn't seem to lend itself correctly. i.e. - "Why is that I can't paint with the colors of the wind?" Shouldn't that be "Why isn't it that I can't paint with the colors of the wind?" or Why is it that I can't paint with the colors of the wind?"

You've taken my breath away with this work.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

This poem should be at 100%. This is one of the most beautiful pieces I have ever read. So profound and true...........Amazing!

[Tarik]

this is beautifully profound. Thanks for sharing.

[An owl on the moon]

There is such a deeply moving feel to your words.. reflections that reach inside and questions that call out for answers.. Beautifully profound.

[OT]

oh very well written!! the images are crystalline and well sculpted - they are clear for us to see - brilliantly constructed - I loved the "wild hues" of the wind - so very clever!! nice!!!

[Star Wolf]

This is awesome, very creative and shows you have talent and skill. The imagery in this is outstanding and so beautiful. It's like a flight of wonder that abruptly ends in disappointment. I love this!

[abhas]

ahh.. this is quite something... feels like words from a suspended state... and every stanza has an element to excite... and i like the fact that the poem has less regularity in it... it makes the life force of the poem even more... than it would have did if it were in a regular rhyming sense... it was very creative... and the last lines were really thoughtful...

[Ladysue]

This is deep, creative and insightful...I thought you painted with colors of the wind amazingly...a good piece of work...

[Linear]

The line, with a swift of it's gloss, didnt seem to make sense to me, other than that I truely enjoyed this poetry, lots of questions for the reader to ponder over, and i'm thinking just maybe you can paint with the colours of the wind. well done