Truth and Consequences

Some things are better left unsaid best locked in your heart there saved The pain you harbor in your chest is your own, to take to the grave

Life seems a never ending dream

filled with hopelessness and despair

Where we are put to trial everyday

while suffering is everywhere

 

To friends who think they come up short

through transgressions against a mate

Who feel they should confess their sins

then sit back and accept their fate

 

Some things are better left unsaid

best locked in your heart there to save

The pain you harbor in your chest

is your own, to take to the grave

 

Confessing sins to a loved one

while it serves to ease guilt in you

Transfers your pain to the other

who is blameless for what you do

 

Shame is the thing that hurts the most

it teaches us valuable things

Such as what not to do next time

you are hurt and the telephone rings

 

Author's Note

I have given this much thought. Many friends over the years have asked me if they should confess to their lovers. I have come to see it is a selfish act. While most religions and 12 step programs say confess as the Catholics do. I say no. You are crushing the innocent partners soul with your confession. Sometimes it's better to take responsibility for your actions. Live with the pain of what you did. It will help guide you next time. When one laments the wrongs of their life it creates these pains. They are called the conscience. So live with them. And try to be better next time. I have made many mistakes and I shall atone for them in the end. I did these things myself and it is not for others to suffer the consequences. I am glad I will take my own transgressions with me. After all I am responsible for what I do as is everyone. I have spent many years trying to reconcile with myself. I am not saying I did anything truly awful. However I let myself down more than a few times in my youth.

Reviews

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Tate,

Are you getting better as a writer?! It seems to me that your more recent writes greatly surpass what I've read of you in years past. Now know that I have always thought your poetry to be beautiful from a raw passion sense, and that full continues, but your recent skill in language is so wonderful.

Now in this piece, while I really love the poem, I read the "Author's Note" first, and I found the words to be profound. You and I agree wholeheartedly on this and I didn't think that any other really understood this. But you do. I am gratified. This is profound wisdom, Tate. I don't think I have any serious transgressions either--but you never know what might be serious to a loved one. Nonetheless, swallow it. Don't cause grief. Protect your loved ones. If they don't need to know and the knowledge would cause them pain, swallow it. Don't be selfish. Keep quiet and give them a hug instead. Now I'm not advocating lying or going behind a loved one's back. That is pure selfishness as well, and not in the best interests of family. No, I'm talking about protecting the ones you love, not pulling the wool over their eyes. I'm talking about being an adult and making well thought out and generous decisions. I'm talking about withholding unnecessary pain as you are as well.

Beautiful sentiments as always. I get this one and so fully agree.

Best regards,

Rick

[Sami Khalil]

First time I visit you to leave a review and I,m amazed at the depth of your wisdom and intellect due to knowledge or experience . I, personaly confess only in silence to God and no man for God in my belief is the only judge but also I agree with you too that some things need to be kept secret for it will devastate the other person . Silence is a crime if we witness evil and don,t report it or stop it . We become silent partners of the crime committed . But since this poem is on relationships between friends or partners it is wiser like you said sir but in the meantime we have to live with our own guilt . Let us suffer instead of them . A very deep write and thought provoking ....Bravo

[Tate Morgan]

thank you .You have grasped this concept completely well done!

[Sami Khalil]

Have a great one ...:)

[Marie]

You are right. Things people want to get out in the open are probably best off hidden.

[Tate Morgan]

I agree. it does no good to tell the one you cheated on. It only makes them feel inferior and set upon. Some things are meant to bother the conscience and should the rest of your days

[K. D. Kromminga]

For the most part I agree with the premise of this poem. Being a Law Student as well as a writer, I know indelibly that most concepts of guilt and innocence are artificial constructs and not always helpful. Most of us feel guilty and shameful about something because society says that it is wrong, because of peer pressure, not because its a natural thing to feel. Guilt should not come from peer pressure, guilt should come from regretting the actual act of harming another human being. Like any other act that you do, you should ask yourselves who are you harming more by the act of confession? If you are doing more harm then good to another, confession is a selfish act.

[Tate Morgan]

you certainly found one of my more obscure works today. Thank you for reading this .it is a controversial thought .But I hold to my convictions as truth much to somes dismay

[FocusedAmnesia]

So completely and utterly touching. I absolutely love this verse:
"Some things are better left unsaid
best locked in your heart there to save
The pain you harbor in your chest
is your own, to take to the grave"

[the_stoic]

this is so true and so touching .. brilliant

[Mark]

While it cannot be argued that confession brings pain, it also permits healing. A horrific secret, like an iron maul, drives itself deeper and ever deeper into the heart of a relationship and will eventually break it. If your lover cannot forgive you together, how could you ever have forgiven yourself alone? For forgiveness is at the very core of a solid relationship, and secrecy and deceit are its anathema.
SO--
Though you perceive that I disagree with your premise, that does not in any way detract from the loveliness of your poem. Poetry is, first and foremost after all is said and done, an expression in our own terms of what lives in our hearts, and your heart, my friend, is nearly unique--among men, anyway--in its ability to openly view, analyze and disseminate your feelings. Great big sticky kudos to you!

[Lena M. P.]

I don't know if confession is good for the soul but I feel that if someone feels the need to cheat then they should be up front and honest to themselves and their current mates to say 'it is time to go our separate ways'. What hurts the most is the lies and deceptions. But I do agree that once the damage is done, if perchance you got away with it and are truly remorseful, it may be better to be left unsaid. I really enjoyed reading your poem Tate was usual. You are a truly gifted and sensitive writer.

[lee von cleef]

Truth is you don't hide much from anyone who you have let hold your heart.Absolution
is something you give yourself.Head up square shoulders look out where you want to be and you are there.

[Barbara Walker]

I agree with this, very much! What is the loved one to do with this burden given them? It will weigh on their soul, raise more questions and fears. This is a poem holding much wisdom. Kudos!