My Truth

Tate and I

This the question of existence

to be a good soul all my days

I find the problem in my years

setting example by my ways

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As I have tried to reconcile

with the conscience that rules my soul

I always find I come up short

never quite reaching that fine goal

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When I was young I ruled the waves

holding sway in every court

I did as my heart commanded

as if life were a game of sport

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But now that I am not alone

I find myself caring much more

How my character is perceived

and what I hide behind each door

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So now I have committed to

repairing the mistakes and flaws

Fixing all the things that went wrong

when I did not follow the laws

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I pray that I be successful

in changing my bad ways to good

To give my child a fighting chance

just as every father should

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If only I could travel back

to correct the sins of my youth

I could tell him to be like me

knowing I was telling the truth

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Author's Note

It hurts my soul to even think of some of the foolish misguided passions and mistakes my life once fed. Don't we all wonder what if? I suppose we all would like to be forgiven for the transgressions of our youth. If we could who among us would not go back and repair the damage we have wreaked? Every time I have been upset with my son. I think back to the wasteland that my youth devastated. I find it easy to forgive his little transgressions.
I'm proud to say my son is a better man than me. And my wife a better woman than I deserve. But I shall stay with her so long as she will have me and count my never ending blessings.

Reviews

[Christina May Shanaberg]

Your writing, lately, says that you are becoming a better man than you believed that you could be. You have opened the shades, taken the shades from your eyes; you are seeing life living, maybe, for the very first time. Your observations are filled with beauty. You have come full circle. You are blessed and are, finally, humble enough to recieve the blessing. I love your recent writes, because you are so alive, finally. No more searching, but knowing. You are a very talented man and, now, you know just how gifted you are to be able to express your feelings to the world. Your son is lucky to have you, as you are now; yesterday is dead and gone. Tomorrow lives on. I loved this! Perfect!!

[Laura E. Aranda]

Thank you for submitting this in my contest. It was a heart wrenching read ...one most of us can relate to.....I especially enjoyed the line:

If only I could travel back to correct the sins of my youth I could tell him to be like me knowing I was telling the truth

[Arielle Ann]

yes you are so right...we all do mistakes in ignorance , arrogance and regret about them till life's end! but on the positive notes,we all learn from our mistakes dont we :)

[Aya Fayyad]

great read! i think many people can relate to this, as it isnt easy for many.

[JB Murray]

Wow... I am nearly speechless with this one. I'm not even a father, but this piece still chokes one's soul. What a fantastic write! I have read much of your stuff over the years, and this one by far, stands atop the heap, almost alone... a single shinning star in a dark unlit sky! I would like to share this with others, drop me a line and let me know if that's all right... I think a good deal of people will find this a great read! thanks!

[Mary Fioratti]

Such a honest and transparent poem. I could feel each word. We all do so many things that we regret, but this is part of the learning of life. "I did as my heart commanded".. We still do it... just in a different way... as you said: "How my character is perceived...and what I hide behind each door"...
So intense and true your poem.
*Mary*

[Seshat Nidaba]

This was a feel good poem, one of redemption and human character. I enjoyed it a lot.

[gimpy]

This poem was realy amazing I obviously I don't speak from my experence but it is my opinion that every father should hope that their children not make the same mistakes as they have this poem is a great awesome job

[Pradnya]

i just loved your poem, actually tate i loved all your poems i have read so far, but this one is just fantastic, i loved it so much, thank u so much for sharing such a beautiful poem of yours

[realmwriter]

If I could fix the trangressions of my youth to save my Daughter from making the same mistakes that I once did I would hop head frist on that train and ride it to the end.

She is the only reason I continue to breath on this cold and dingy ground and he only reason I can make a smile out of a frown.

She turned me into a man where once only boy first stood, she made me see that I have done some good.

I will not find a w ay to make all of my wrongs right, but I will do my best to save her from that plight.

And though I know myself to be a humble man, I also know that I will die from doing all I can.

I looked into my daughters eyes the other day and saw her gleefully staring back, but for all things that I have done, for her Ill take the rack.


This a wonderfull piece Tate and I wish you and your Son all of the best in the world!

[Crowley]

Its the growing and identifying part that is the true beauty. Actually making it to a point in life that we are actually able to have these revelations. So many people never make it there and don't have these great attributes for the children to see and hopefully emulate. Great writing Tate....